False Colours Read Free

you anything so vulgar! Besides, it isn’t true.’
    ‘How can you say so, when my godfather was so obliging as to leave his fortune to me?’ he said reproachfully.
    ‘Is that what you mean? But it isn’t a fortune, Kit! I wish it were—and I must own I thought it would be, for Mr Bembridge was always said to be very well to pass, only it turns out to be no such thing, and he was possessed merely of what Adlestrop, detestable creature, calls a competence .Poor man! I dare say it was not his fault, so you mustn’t blame him!’
    ‘I don’t! A pretty easy competence, Mama!’
    ‘A competence,’ stated her ladyship, with conviction, ‘ cannot be described as easy! You are talking like Adlestrop, and I wish you will not!’
    Kit was aware that the family’s man of business had never been a favourite with his mother, but these embittered references to him seemed to call for explanation. ‘What’s Adlestrop done to offend you, Mama?’ he asked.
    ‘Adlestrop is a—Oh, let us not talk about him! Such a screw, and so malignant! I can’t think why I mentioned him, except that he told me, when Mr Bembridge died, that there was no occasion for you to come home, because there are no estates in question, or anything you might be obliged to attend to yourself—nothing but those detestable Funds ,whatever they may be—and pray don’t tell me, Kit, for you might as well talk gibberish! I perfectly understand that they are holy ,and must on no account be touched; and, for my part, I would never invest my money in anything so stupid!’
    ‘Of course you wouldn’t!’ agreed Kit. ‘It would never stay in your purse long enough to be invested in anything!’
    She considered this for a moment, and then sighed, and said: ‘No; that’s true! It is the most lowering reflection. I have frequently tried to cultivate habits of economy, but I don’t seem to have the knack of it. None of the Cliffes have! And the dreadful thing is, Kit, that such habits only lead to waste! ’
    He gave a shout of laughter, but, although her eyes twinkled sympathetically, she said earnestly: ‘Yes, but they do! I purchased a cheap gown once, because Papa cut up stiff over one of Celeste’s bills, but it was so horrid that I was obliged to give it to Rimpton, without once wearing it! And when I gave orders for an economical dinner Papa got up from the table, and went straight off to the Clarendon, which is quite the most expensive hotel in London! Yes, you may laugh, but you have no experience of such matters. I assure you, the instant you begin to practise economy you will find yourself spending far more than ever you did before you embarked on such a ruinous course!’
    ‘No, shall I? Perhaps I had better sell out of the Funds immediately, and start wasting the ready!’
    ‘Nonsense! I know very well you haven’t come home to do that! So what has brought you home, dearest? I’m persuaded it wasn’t to look after these prodigious affairs of yours, so don’t try to bamboozle me!’
    ‘Well—not entirely,’ he admitted. He hesitated, colouring a little, and then said, meeting her look of inquiry: ‘To own the truth, I took a notion into my head—stupid, I dare say, but I couldn’t be rid of it—that Evelyn is in some sort of trouble—or just botheration, perhaps—and might need me. So I made my prodigious affairs serve as a reason for wanting leave of absence. Now tell me I’m an airdreamer! I wish you may!’
    She said instead, in a marvelling tone: ‘Do you still get these feelings, both of you? As though one’s own troubles were not enough to bear!’
    ‘I see: I am not an airdreamer. What’s amiss, Mama?’
    ‘Oh, nothing, Kit! That is to say—well, nothing you can cure, and nothing at all if Evelyn returns tomorrow!’
    ‘Returns? Where is he?’
    ‘I don’t know!’ disclosed her ladyship. ‘No one knows!’
    He looked startled, and, at the same time, incredulous. Then he remembered that when she had first seen