Even Zombie Killers Get The Blues (Zombie Killer Blues) Read Free Page A

one he had been using to take a crap. Jonesy stepped forward,
faster than me, and swung that big steel rod he carries right at the guys’
legs. Down he went, and then Jonesy was beating the brains out of the Z before
it got a chance to scream.

“Everybody up! Weapons Hot! Doc, check him out! AND SHUT HIM THE FUCK UP!”
    The team was up already in a 360 perimeter. Doc Hamilton
ran over to the Engineer, who lay on the ground yelling “OH MY GOD!” over and
over. The Doc took one look at his wound, stood up, pulled his suppressed .22
and shot him in the head. The guy flopped once more then lay still. I stood in
shock for a few seconds at the speed of the whole thing, then snapped out of
it.

“Doc, take his tags, any personal effects; Jonesy, you and Syzmanski bury him.
Then split his equipment up around the squad.”

I had screwed up. I hadn’t assigned anyone to keep watch over him and now the
guy was dead, killed by a stupid mistake. He had probably just dug a cat hole
and not checked the brush or tall grass around him. Like I said, Zs are animal-smart.
It had probably waited for him. Damn, just goddamn.  I hung my head down and watched
them dig a quick, shallow hole and roll his body in it. You just assumed that
someone who had survived this far in the post-plague world would know you never
went anywhere alone and you always checked out the area you were in.

Brit walked over to me, wanting to know what to do next.
    “Hey Chief, it could have happened to anyone. You
can’t babysit everyone and it was the chain of command that saddled us with
him. Are we Charlie Mike?”  She was asking if we were continuing the mission.

“Yeah, I suppose we have to. Just a sucky way to go.”
    “I know, Nick” she said, then punched me as hard as
she could in the shoulder. “Now suck it up and let’s go. You know it’s a hard
world we’re living in.”
    “Yeah, I know … if you can call it living.”

 
    Chapter 4
    “Empire, Empire, this is Lost Boys, over.” I let go
of the hand mike and waited 30 seconds. Stupid radio watch back at Fort Orange was
probably stuffing his face.

I tried again. “Empire, Empire, this is Lost Boys, over.”

“Kilo 39, this is Gulf 38, use proper radio procedure, over.”
    “Yes, because the Zombies are listening over the
secure net, over.”

There was a long silence. I pictured the fat fobbit running to his commander.
Sir, those stupid civilian scouts are on the radio again, they are being mean
to me .

“Lost Boys 6, this is Empire 6, SITREP, over.”
Great, the Task Force Commander, LTC MacDonald, aka Jackass. We love each
other. Actually, we frackin’ hate each other. Mutual disrespect based on
numerous incidents of his stupidity and incompetence.
    “Well, Empire 6, we lost our Engineer asset, over.”
    “What do you mean lost, over.”
    “Lost, gone, finished, dead, over.”
    “Dead how, over?”
    “Cessation of heartbeat due to interdiction of
cranial matter by copper and lead alloys, over.”
    “Don’t be such a fucking smartass,
Agostine.”
    “Empire 6, please use proper radio procedure, over.”
    The line was quiet for a full minute. I pictured
Jackass smashing things in the TOC. He was notorious for throwing things at
subordinates. I couldn’t help messing with him. I knew the fact that he needed
me and my people and couldn’t do anything about me sent him ballistic. I was
actually trying to get him to have a stroke.

“Lost Boys 6, this is Empire 6. What happened to your engineer, over.”
    “Bitten by a zombie, we had to neutralize him,
over.”
    “Way to fail on the job, Lost Boys 6.
I’ll make sure you write his wife, over.” God, that man
was a prick.
    “Can do, Empire 6. Are we going to get another
asset? Over.”
    “Negative, no air assets available.
Continue Mission, Lost Boys. Out.” Had to get the last word in. Jerk. I stuffed the hand mike back in Syzmanskis’
rucksack and turned off the SINCGARS radio. 

“I think you two should kiss