Christy Miller's Diary Read Free Page A

going to school after Christmas vacation and running into Rick.
    Why does life have to be so complicated?
December 28
    I’m back, DSF.
    And as if that last entry wasn’t enough to keep me tossing and turning all night, guess who sent me a letter here at my aunt and uncle’s house?
    Alissa.
    She said she lost my address in Escondido. And that’s not all she said. She told me she’s pregnant. My hand is shaking as I write this. She’s pregnant. I still can’t believe it. I started crying so hard when I read her letter. She asked me to pray for her and I did. A lot. I fell asleep for a while and now it’s the middle of the night and very quiet. I think I woke up because there’s so much on my mind. My body fell asleep, but my mind didn’t. It kept going and going until all my wild dreams woke me up.
    The only good thing I can think of right now is that Alissa said she thought about having an abortion, but then changed her mind because a friend of hers had one a few years ago and then wished she hadn’t. Alissa said she’d probably have the baby and then put it up for adoption. I pray that’s what she does. Alissa also said she went to a Crisis Pregnancy Center and the counselor there gave her a Bible. I pray she reads that Bible until the words break through into that secret place in her heart. God’s words are like rays of light. They can slip through the tiniest opening and make all the darkness instantly disappear.
    I know that’s true for Alissa but it’s also true for me and my problems with my friends. Although my problems seem like nothing compared to what Alissa is going through. Her dad is dead and her mom is an alcoholic. She doesn’t have any brothers or sisters. What would I be like if I were in her situation or if I’d been through all the things she’s been through?
    Oh, Dear Father God, please be extra close to Alissa right now. Shine Your light into the hurt and darkness in her life and make it so that she can see You and call out to You and trust in You. Please break through the powers of darkness that have a chain around the secret place in her heart. Break through and shine Your light there. I want her to come to know You. Amen.
December 29
    DSF,
    Today was one of those battles with my controlling aunt when she took me shopping and wanted me to get my hair cut again like she talked me into doing last summer. I didn’t get it cut. Then my aunt and I got into an argument at the restaurant when she said she thought Alissa was so perfect and she thought I should try to be more like Alissa. I blurted out that Alissa was pregnant and asked my aunt if that’s what she wanted for me, too. She got SOOOO mad! But that’s another story.
    What I wanted to write down were the words to this song I kept singing over and over in my head, like a prayer when we were at the hair salon. Here are the words:
    Touch this heart, so full of pain,
    Heal it with Your love.
    Make it soft and warm again,
    Melt me with your love.
    I don’t want to push You away,
    Come back in
    Come to stay.
    Make me tender, just like You.
    Melt me with Your love.
    I wish I could be soft and tender all the time. Oh, and I should tell you what happened after we got back from shopping. Doug was here at my aunt and uncle’s and he said my hair smelled like green apples. Then he leaned over in the front of my aunt and uncle’s house to smell my hair, and at that exact moment, Todd went driving by in his old VW bus!!! I’m pretty sure he saw us. I wish Todd would have stopped. Then he would have seen there’s nothing going on between me and Doug, really. I’m sure it didn’t look that way just driving by.
    If Todd stopped, then he would’ve heard Doug tell me he was going to take Tracy out. I was really happy about that because she likes him and if Todd finds out that Doug is going out with Tracy then he won’t think I was trying to get Doug interested in me while we were ice-skating.
January 1
    Happy New Year, Dear Silent