Blind Date Disasters & Eat Your Heart Out Read Free

wanted to talk to you.”
    Never mind? Cami had used a swear word and her mother had said never mind? All Cami’s problems vanished as she sank to the bed and clutched the phone.
    Someone had to be sick.
    Dying.
    Or already dead. “What’s the matter?” she demanded, just as bossy, stubborn and domineering as her mother. “Tell me. I can take it.”
    â€œNothing.”
    â€œMom!”
    â€œI just have a little favor, that’s all. Can’t a mother call her own daughter for one little favor?”
    Cami was so relieved she let her guard down. A bad mistake with her mother. “Well, of course you can.”
    â€œI need you to go out with—”
    â€œOh, no, you don’t.” It didn’t take a rocket scientist to know where this was going. “Not another blind date.”
    Her mother had started this when Cami and her sister turned twenty-one and she hadn’t wavered in her single, solitary mission to marry her daughters off in order to get grandchildren.
    â€œIt’s just one little date, Cami. One little favor. Just one little short night out of your life.”
    â€œToo many littles.”
    Maybe deep, deep down Cami had the same happily-ever-after dream for herself that her mother did, but she wasn’t going to admit it to the woman who had given her more blind dates from hell than any dating service ever could. Plus, truth told, Cami was terrified of finding Mr. Right. She didn’t believe in Mr. Right. “No.”
    â€œJust because you think you’ve got it all together now that you’ve received your design degree doesn’t mean your future is set.”
    â€œMy future is fine.”
    â€œReally? Is your laundry done?”
    Cami glanced guiltily at the pile of dirty clothes in the corner behind the door. “What does that have to do with anything!”
    â€œSo it’s not.”
    â€œNo to the date. Double no. Triple no.”
    â€œOh, sure.” Her mother’s voice softened as she switched tactics, became vulnerable. Sad. “Turn me down in my time of need. I understand. I only spent twenty-four long, sweaty, torturous hours in labor with you and Dimi, and—”
    â€œAnd we nearly killed you,” Cami said in tune with her mother, who was really getting into the story now, and had even mustered tears in her voice. “I know, Mom,” she said, rubbing her forehead and the ache that settled there every time she spoke with her mother. “I remember.” How could she forget when her mother pulled this story out at every turn?
    â€œI’m going to die soon, you know.”
    â€œOh, no, you’re not,” Cami said with a laugh. “You’re going to outlive us all.”
    â€œYou never know.”
    â€œMom.”
    â€œYou’d really send me off to heaven, where you know I’m going to run into Aunt Bev andCici, both of whom had daughters who gave them five grandchildren? Each? ”
    â€œMom—”
    â€œAll I’m asking for is one little bundle of love to treasure in my final days, one grandchild. But apparently even that’s too much.”
    Cami’s headache increased in pressure so that she could see herself keeling over in nothing but her shirt, socks and panties, with Mr. Sexy Tool Belt the only one around to resuscitate her. “Look, Mom, you know I love you, but—”
    â€œHe’s very handsome, too. I promise.”
    â€œWho?”
    â€œYour date! Keep up, Cami. He’s Great-Aunt Lulu’s cousin’s brother-in-law, and she swears by him, which is good enough for me. I hear he makes a wonderful living doing those fancy dub-dub-dub thingies…what are they called again?”
    â€œWeb sites.” Cami let out a soundless sigh, tipped her head back and stared at the ceiling. As if divine intervention could help when it came to her mother! No one could help, not even God, not when Sara Lynn Anderson had made up