Bill 2 - on the Planet of Robot Slaves Read Free

the laser scalpel sizzled his gums and forceps twisted an incisor.
    “Oops, sorry, I forgot.” Praktis lied sadistically as he shot in a local anesthetic before continuing. In a matter of seconds the tooth was out, Bill's gum was peeled back, the hole in his jaw drilled larger, the roots of the fang firmly implanted, GrowFlesh pumped into the interstices before sutureglue sealed it all into place.
    “Rinse and spit and get out of here,” Praktis ordered as Bill climbed groggily on his feet.
    “That's better,” Bill said, admiring himself in the mirror. He twanged each tusk in turn, then smiled a twisted smile. This was really a very revolting expression. “Deathwish Drang would be proud to see me, if he was still alive.”
    “Out.”
    “Not yet, Doc.” He tore the oversized shoe from his right foot and stretched out his long toes. Then raked three long grooves into the plastic floor. “What about this, huh? What about this?”
    “Very nice indeed, if I say so myself. I think your claws need trimming.”
    “The foot needs changing! Am I to go through the rest of my life with a giant chicken foot stuck onto my ankle?”
    “Why not? It sure beats a wooden leg.”
    “I want a real foot!”
    “You got a real foot — a real giant mutated chicken foot. And let me tell you, not that I want to brag, but there isn't another surgeon in the known universe that could have done that. And they complain about my so-called illegal experiments! They'll come crawling to me when they have foot trouble — you wait and see.”
    “I don't want to wait and see nothing. Except a real live human foot there.”
    “You know the drill, trooper, so don't come whining to me with your petty problems. There is a war on, soldier — or haven't you heard? There are shortages. And one thing in really short supply is spare feet.”
    “Isn't there anything you can do?”
    “I could give you a rabbit's foot instead. They are supposed to be very lucky.”
    Bill howled, “I want a real foot!”
    His howl went unheard because at that moment there was a loud explosion that blew away most of the roof of the hospital.

CHAPTER 2
    While Dr. Praktis vibrated with fear, gaping vacantly at the gaping hole and falling debris, Bill dived under the metal table. Once his personal ass had been saved he thought of the future, and his chicken foot, so out of pure selfishness reached out and dragged the doctor to safety. A great lump of masonry fell on the spot where Praktis had just been standing and he gurgled with horror. Then bathed Bill with spaniel eyes of gratitude.
    “You saved my life,” he whimpered.
    “Just don't forget that when the next shipment of frozen feet arrive. I want first pick.”
    “It will be yours! If you are in a hurry I have a very dainty size three foot that was all that was left of a nurse eaten by guard dogs.”
    “No, thanks. I'll wait. The one I got now has great combat possibilities until Mr. Right Foot comes along.”
    “Why are you talking about combat?” Praktis squeaked.
    “Because we are in it right now. Or don't those bombs, shells, and screams of the dying mean anything to you?”
    Praktis's moan of agony was drowned out by a thunderous flapping as a shadow passed over them. Bill chanced a quick look out from under the table and saw that a ponderous dragon was flying in circles above. The dragon saw his movement with its beady eye, opened its mouth and belched out a tongue of flame. Bill jerked his head back and the smoky fireball sizzled the floor all around them. Praktis groaned and quivered. Bill just felt angry.
    “This is no way to run a military base. Where are the defenses? The antidragon guns? I am going to get that scaly mother before it gets me!”
    As soon as the dragon had flapped off he scuttled from under the table and dived through the opening where the wall had been. He wasted just one second admiring the great amount of damage that the dragon had done so quickly — then dived for cover again as