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right.”

    “Did you take much of a hand in the design?”

    “Yes.”

    I hadn’t much experience as an interviewer but I had helped Trudi to edit some of the interviews for her site. I knew how just scintillating it was going to be for the followers of her blog to read a column of synonyms for ‘yes.’ Supposing he said, ‘no’ once? The thrill would be just devastating.

    I changed tack. “Do any of the rooms have chairs, Mr Grarr?”

    “Yes. Most of them do.”

    I looked at him and raised an eyebrow. He wasn’t getting it. “Are many of the chairs comfortable?”

    “Yes.” He said, “All of them.”

    “As comfortable as standing on stone in a hallway, more comfortable or less, would you say?”

    He frowned. “Much more. Would you like to sit down, Ms Cuddles?” He had a very attractive frown. I counted that a plus, because I was confident of seeing many more frowns.

    “Why thank you, Mr Grarr. What an excellent idea.”

    He frowned, “Why did you not ask?”

    Bernhard Grarr showed me into a large room lined in pale wood. The walls were plain with no windows. It was brightly lit from the high glass roof. Three pale chairs were arranged around a low wooden table. At the far end was a door like the one we entered through.  

    As the door opened I thought I must be looking into a huge mirror. But then, where was my reflection? If he had a reflection and I didn’t, that would mean that I was a vampire. Or something. This whole thing was too confusing.

    Through the door stepped another of Bernhard, an exact replica. I decided that they must be twins. The proximity of one of them had been hard enough to deal with. Now two ? I could wind up hospitalized.

    He came towards me and my knees weakened as he spoke, “Is this Trudi Bumpschutz? I didn’t think she would be nearly so… beautiful.”

    “No, this is Trudi Bumpschutz’s impostor who she sends for interviews she can’t be bothered to do herself. This is Ms Cuddles.”

    Benjy said, “Bernhard, you’re joking. Tell me you’re joking.”

    “Maxi Cuddles. Ms Cuddles, this is my brother Benjy.”

    He stood in front of me and towered over me. A perfect mirror of Bernhard, yet something was distinct in the look in his eye, the slight turn of amusement on the corners of his mouth. In his voice he carried a faint trickle of playfulness.

    He looked me over. I felt his eyes lap me up from head to toe and back. He didn’t miss a detail. As his eyes feasted on my lips, his tongue flicked out to lick his own.  

    After he toured my face he looked slowly and deliberately at my neck and my throat. He followed the slopes down to my creamy, fluttering cleavage. Inspecting my breasts was an unhurried affair and it involved two distinct sighs on his part.

    My heart pounded so hard that I thought it might jump out and into his hands.

    “But she’s gorgeous, Bernhard.”

    “Yes, Benjy. I know.” He did? That was the first I’d heard of it.  

    “Has Mischa seem her? More important has he sniffed her?”

    “Seen, yes. Not sniffed, except from a distance.” Who was Mischa and when had he seen me?  

    Benjy came closer and instinctively I reached out to shake his hand. His hand snatched away and I remembered what Bernhard had said. No touching. Did they both live in mortal dread of the chubby gene? As fast as he pulled back his arm, my fingertips had touched the back of his hand. A great flash of shock poured through me like thick, cool alcohol.

    Benjy’s hand and his forearm swelled enormously. It was such a sudden and extreme reaction that I thought I must be imagining it, but as his flesh was blanketed in a dark mist, the sleeve of his shirt tore. It looked as though thick fur sprouted from his arm and his knuckles seemed to swell up.

    For an instant, his hand look like a huge rounded paw. His fingernails crackled and appeared to sprout, like claws.

    “Benjy!” At the crack of Bernhard’s voice, Benjy shrank away. He crouched as

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