Aliens for Breakfast Read Free Page A

with bottles, boxes, cans, and jars of food.
    “Yes,” said Richard.
    “It is not here,” said the alien. “Perhaps wecan search some other Earthling’s home? One with a wider range of products?”
    “We have the best kitchen on the planet,” said Richard. “Mom buys everything. If it isn’t here, I don’t know where it could be.” Then he had an idea. “Unless you want to go to the mall.”
    “Is there food at the mall?”
    “Every fast food made in America.”
    “Then by all means let us go there,” said Aric. “And quickly!”

5 .
    The mall was busy for a Thursday afternoon. Richard wondered why. Then he saw that one of the stores was having a promotion. It was for a new men’s perfume called Sweat. A big fat man dressed like a wrestler was giving out free samples.
    “Ugh! Why would anyone want to buy that stuff?” said Richard.
    “To attract the female of the species, of course,” said Aric.
    “Girls? I can see spending money to keep them
away,”
said Richard. “But I’d ratherspend it on something cool. Like that.” He pointed at a black satin baseball jacket in the window of a store. “I don’t have enough money, though. Mom says maybe she’ll get it for my next birthday … Of course, I may never
have
another birthday.” Richard’s hands and feet were really hurting now.
    “After we have destroyed the Drane, the Brigade may find some extra money to buy you a gift,” said Aric. “You have earned something for all you have been through.”
    Aric sounded so sure of destroying Dorf that Richard felt a little better. “Gee, thanks—”he started to say. But Aric interrupted him. “Great Ganoob!” cried the alien. “What is that?”
    They were next to Mutant Splendor, a store that sold sci-fi games, books, toys, masks, and comics. It was just about Richard’s favorite place in the whole world. Today the front of the store was taken up by a giant display of the Space Lords of Gygrax. The big plastic warriors had bright red wings, blue skin, and webbed feet They were all snarling and holding laser swords, as if they were about toattack. The display had sound effects, too—battle noises and strange space music.

    Richard’s mouth dropped open. For a second he forgot that his hands and feet hurt. This was awesome! Ten times better than the comic books!
    But Aric didn’t think so. “You call these Gygraxians?” he snapped. “They are a joke!”
    “You mean there really is a planet Gygrax?” asked Richard.
    “Of course,” said Aric. “But Gygraxians do not have wings. They have fins. Not only that, their skin is orange, not blue. And they never fight. They are the biggest cowards in the galaxy. This is an outrage! I want to speak to the manager.”
    Aric started to hop out of Richard’s pocket. Richard clamped a hand around him. “How can you get so upset about a bunch of stupid toys? Time is running out! You have to remember what the secret weapon is!” Was it Richard’s imagination? Or was he beginning to feel wobbly? Maybe he was dissolving faster!
    “Aric—” Richard went on. But then he froze.Dorf and Henry were walking down the mall. They were dressed in the same red T-shirts and ripped jeans. Dorf was talking, and Henry was listening. He nodded his head at everything Dorf said. As Richard watched, they walked into Pizza World.

    “Aric!” gasped Richard. “There they are! Dorf and Henry! Should we follow them, or what?”
    “Follow,” answered Aric.
    “I’ve never trailed anybody before. What if they see us?”
    “Do not worry,” said Aric. “I will make us invisible.”
    “What! You can do that? How come you didn’t do it before?”
    “It is very expensive. Only for emergencies,” said Aric. “And it only lasts ten minutes. Now let us go.” He made a low humming sound that filled Richard’s head for a moment. As he crossed over to Pizza World, Richard found himself humming too. He couldn’t help himself.
    When he reached for the door of the