your virtue, / Or walk with Kingsânor lose the common touch; / If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you; / If all men count with you, but none too much; / If you can fill the unforgiving minute, / With sixty secondsâ worth of distance run, / Yours is the Earth and everything thatâs in it, / Andâwhich is moreâyouâll be a Man, my son!â It hung where Don would be able to see it when he lay in his bed. He sat there with one foot on a fruit-box to support the leg on which the guitar rested. She grew excited at the surprise of how well he playedâa different kind of excitement from that roused by the park. âBut you should be in a band! If I closed my eyes,Iâd swear there was a record on!âUnder his achievement and her admiration he expanded into ease and hospitality. He fetched two bottles of Pepsi and the end of a banana loaf from the kitchenâMy mom bakes on weekends, when sheâs home from workâand cut the piece share-and-share-alike. They were alone in the house. He took her into the family sittingroom, folded back the plastic sheet that covered the sofa so that she could have the best seat, and showed her how he had taught himself to accompany a Cliff Richard recording. She couldnât tell the difference between the two performers. In the patronage that is the untalentedâs surrogate achievement, she had the wonderful idea that he should get together a band and play for the end-of-term dance. Why not? He went solemn at the responsibility; and then something in him lifted, the light eyes pale-bright, the lips and teeth fresh and sweet in that twilit face.
But she herself was no longer at the school at the end of term. She went only once again to the house with the windmill mailbox. A little girl with woolly pigtails was toldâCharlene, donât stare.âA middle-aged woman with Donâs eyes brought milky cups of tea and called Hillela âmissâ. âMy momâs shy with people.âHe said it as if she were not there; and the woman addressed Hillela in the third person: âWouldnât the young lady like a cold drink instead?â
The following week she was sent for by the headmistress. Len was sitting in one of the two chairs that were always placed, slightly turned towards one another, in front of the desk at which the headmistress sat. So someone had died; not long before, a girl had been summoned like this to the presence of a parent, and learned of a death in the family. Hillela stared at Len. Olga? Her other aunt, Pauline? The womanâsomewhereâwho was her mother? A cousin? She woke up, and went over mechanically and kissed him; he kept his face stiff, as if he had something to confess that might spill.
The headmistress began in her classroom story-telling voice. Hillela had been seen with a coloured boy. While she was enjoying on trust the privilege of going to the cinema with her classmates, she had used the opportunity to meet a coloured boy. âA pupil at a school like this one. From her kind of home. The Jewish people have so much self-respectâIâve always admired them for that. Mr Capran, if I knew how Hillela could do what she has done, I could help her. But I cannot comprehend it.âThis was not a matter of just this once. It could not be. It was not something that happened within the scope of peccadilloes recognized at a broadminded school for girls of a high moral standard. Len took Hillela away with him. All he said was (with her beside him in the car again)âI donât understand, either.â
She felt now the fear she had not felt in the headmistressâs study. She hid in the image of Lenâs little sweetheart. âI didnât know he was coloured.â
With a fatherâs shyness, Len was listening for more to come.
âWe all meet boys in town.â She was about to add, even when weâre supposed to be in Sunday school with the little kids. But