Without Looking Back Read Free Page B

again, moving out from behind the table and coming towards him. ‘Don’t – don’t— Listen, I don’t want the others to know yet.’
    Blinking back tears, Louis cupped his hands over his nose and mouth as Papa came forward to grip him tightly by the shoulders. ‘Louis, listen – listen to me. Nothing’s been decided yet. Maman may still change her mind. I’m going to appeal against the decision. I’m going to fight this – I’m going to fight this, I promise you.’ He gave Louis a small shake. His eyes looked desperate, imploring.
    ‘Please, Louis, I really want to wait a bit before I tell the others. I want to enjoy some of this weekend withyou without having it hanging over all of us. Don’t cry, my darling. It’s going to be all right – I promise you it’s going to be all right.’ His fingers dug into Louis’ shoulder blades.
    Louis pressed his hands to his face and sniffed hard.
    ‘That’s it,’ Papa said desperately. ‘Come over to the sink and wash your face.’
    Louis splashed cold water onto his face while Papa hovered nearby. As he was drying himself with a damp tea towel, he heard the kitchen door open behind him.
    ‘Millie!’ Papa exclaimed with false cheer. ‘Have you found your Barbie set? Let’s go and see what hairstyle you’ve given her.’
    There was a pause, during which Louis rubbed his face hard with the tea towel, carefully keeping his back to the door.
    ‘Wait, Papa,’ Millie was saying as Papa presumably tried to usher her out of the kitchen. ‘What’s the matter with Louis?’
    ‘Nothing!’ Papa exclaimed too loudly. ‘He just got a—some . . . some soap in his eyes while he was helping me with the washing-up. It’s fine, it’s all rinsed out now. Where’s Max?’
    ‘In the
salon
.’
    ‘Let’s go and see if he wants to play a game, shall we?’
    ‘What game?’ Millie asked, distracted, and their voices disappeared down the hall.
    Louis lowered the tea towel and inhaled slowly, gripping the edge of the sink. He could hear Millie trying to persuade Max into a game of Cluedo. Waves of adrenaline still coursed through his body and it was an effort not to start crying again, but he knew that he mustn’t. If he gave the game away now, Millie would sob all night and Max would shut himself in his room and play loud music for the rest of the weekend. But the news took his breath away. He couldn’t believe that Maman had won the court case and they were only going to be allowed supervised visits with Papa at some ‘family centre’ from now on. He couldn’t believe that this was the last time they would be coming to Papa’s flat, the last time they would be going on a trip together. Maman had said that the supervised visits would only be until Papa had got his life back together again, but the doctor had told Papa he might have to be on anti-depressants for the rest of his life. How would they ever be able to talk to Papa with some stranger sitting in the corner of the room and listening in? It would all be an act, it would all be artificial – they would have to edit everything they said and soon Papa would become a stranger and they probably wouldn’t even be able to remember how tospeak English any more . . . Suddenly, Louis hated his mother. She kept saying that it was for their own good, that she hadn’t trusted Papa since the time he had taken an overdose of sleeping pills and collapsed while they were staying at his flat, but Louis didn’t really buy it. She knew how much better he was now. He hadn’t fallen apart in front of them for ages. She was still angry with him for falling in love with that woman from work. She just wanted revenge.
    ‘Louis, come and play, pleeease!’ It was Millie, calling from the living room. Grabbing a piece of kitchen towel from the roll, Louis blew his nose fiercely, rubbed his eyes a final time and then, taking a calming breath, walked slowly along to the living room.
    ‘I’m Miss Scarlet, Max is Colonel Mustard,