it was also my fault Frankie had that haunted look in her eye. I wanted to protect everyone I loved, but you can’t protect someone from the grief you caused.
3
Frankie
Present
I tossed my keys onto the kitchen counter as I sifted through my mail. As usual, nothing but bills. I started pulling off my clothes as I headed towards my bedroom. I needed to catch up on some quality Netflix time, and the only way to binge watch was to do so on the couch wearing sweats.
I pulled my favorite pair of leggings out of the drawer and wiggled them on. Walking over to my vanity I thumbed my favorite hoodie. It was old and brought back memories better left in the past, but it always made me feel safe. After the way I’d been feeling today, I needed a little comfort.
On my way out of the room something caught my eye. I stepped closer to my dresser and picked up the framed picture that had been laying facedown.
That’s weird.
It must have fallen over somehow. I stared at the picture for a minute, remembering a time when things were a lot less complicated. It was a picture of me, Enzo and Eddie from when we were little kids. I’d always loved this picture, even when I was a little girl. I was squished between the two boys. Enzo and I were looking at each other and laughing and Eddie was glaring off to the side with his arms crossed in front of him. I couldn’t remember why he was mad, but it was so like him to be pissy about something or other. I placed the frame back on the dresser with a sigh.
Why do I torment myself like this?
I wandered into the kitchen, grabbed a pint of ice cream, and settled on the couch for my nightly ritual of Netflix bingeing. Instead of paying attention to the TV, I found myself drifting into old memories.
4
Frankie
Age 14
12 years earlier…
“ W hy do you have to go? Why can’t you stay?” I cried, clinging to Enzo’s sweatshirt.
“Franny, we’ve been over this,” Enzo said softly, taking my face in his hands and raising my head so he could look me in the eye.
“But what if you get hurt?” I asked desperately. Enzo sighed, brushing away my tears with his thumbs.
“Nothing is going to happen to me, okay? It’s only eighteen months, I’ll be back before you know it.”
“That’s a long time!” I wailed, wrapping my arms tight around his waist and burrowing my face in his chest.
Enzo’s arms came around me and he held me tight. I always felt safe when I was with him and I felt especially safe when he held me. “Shh. Franny, it’s going to be all right. I promise,” he said rubbing my back soothingly.
“Enzo, darling. It’s time,” Marcella, Enzo’s mother, reminded him softly.
He pulled back and took my face in his hands once again. “Hey, have I ever broken a promise to you?” he asked gently.
“N-No,” I hiccupped. He hadn’t—not once. Enzo always kept his promises no matter what. He was the only one I could rely on. Even Eddie broke promises to me.
“I’ll be back. I promise. Now I need you to promise me something. Can you do that?” he asked, his eyes imploring me to agree. I nodded, but kept my mouth closed. I was afraid I’d start sobbing again if I tried to talk. “I need you to promise me that you’ll stay safe. Eddie’s got your back if you need it, but be smart. I need you to be safe,” he repeated. “Okay?”
I sniffed and nodded again. “Okay,” I croaked.
“Good girl,” he said and kissed my forehead before releasing me. I shivered as a cold breeze hit my bare arms. Enzo noticed and unzipped his hoodie. “Here,” he said, offering it to me. I took it and shrugged it on. It smelled like him, and I immediately felt comforted.
We were standing outside saying our goodbyes before Enzo’s mother drove him to the airport to report for boot camp. I tried to keep the tears at bay as I watched him embrace my mother and his aunt. He gave Eddie a half handshake, half hug. He said something to Eddie when they pulled away, but the wind caught