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a pearl white Land Cruiser no less? Tell me, how does it feel to rub your fingers through all of that curly hair?”
    â€œSee, now you acting silly.”
    â€œBump that! I couldn’t tell, does he still have all of his hair?”
    â€œHe’s losing a little in the middle, but—”
    â€œLet me tell you something. On a man as fine as him, it doesn’t really matter. And I usually don’t get into light-skinned brothers. I noticed he has some big hands and thick fingers. Like softball mitts or something. Does he have big feet?”
    â€œJacqui!” Betty said, in an embarrassed tone, knowing where her friend was going with the question.
    â€œWhat? You better tell me something! I want de-tails. You know what they say about men with big hands and feet.”
    â€œOkay, okay. His feet are big too. I don’t know what shoe size he wears, but they’re big. And guess what,” Betty added in an attempt to change the direction of the conversation. “When we were watching Soul Food the other night, I noticed the hair on his chest is shaped like a giant curly valentine. I just love running my fingers—”
    â€œPlease. He could have a toupee stapled to his chest for all I care. Be glad he got big feet. I dated this guy namedMorris?” she said, raising her voice at the end of each sentence in a questioning tone. “I think he was a Sigma? Brother was six feet three? Two hundred pounds, I think? Wore a size-eight shoe. Swear ta God, I kid you not! I ain’t never dated a man who got a package of M&M’s and a Rugrats coloring book when he bought new shoes. Home-boy was Buster Browned down to the ground,” Jacqui said to Betty. “And on top of that I think he was gay or at least bi.”
    â€œNoooo. Really?”
    â€œYeah. I always thought he had a little sugar in his tank, but I sent him to the video store to get a movie and he came back and handed me the box. So I looked at it quick thinking it was Forrest Gump.”
    â€œAnd it wasn’t?”
    â€œPlease,” Jacqui said with a cluck of her tongue. “It was a gay movie from Greece. Tide of it was, Soros Rumps! And then he tried to act like he made a mistake. Girl can I pick’um or what? But tell me. Getting back to your man, does he have hair on his back?”
    â€œOh God, no! I hate that.”
    â€œWell, I think it’s kinda sexy. But yes,” she said in a you-go-girl voice, “he looks . . . good. I wish I could find me a brother like that.”
    â€œGirl, please. Don’t even go there. Clarke was all that and you chased him away. He was cute.”
    â€œLet’s not even get started on Officer Smith. The man had the intellect of a wet spiderweb. And aggravating? Brother always wanted to fuss about something. He didn’t have ulcers, but he damn sure knew how to give them. I mean, I just can’t go out like that. I’m thirty-four, soon to be thirty-five and—”
    â€œJac, you’re thirty-six.”
    â€œWho asked you anything?”
    â€œJacqui, you’re thirty-six. Repeat after me. Thirty?”
    â€œLike I was going to say, I’ve waited this long. You know?”
    â€œWell, I thought you kinda liked him. Freda Mae was crazy about him.”
    â€œListen. Freda Mae Jordan just wants some grandchildren.She doesn’t care where they come from. The stork could bring them or they could come out of the cabbage patch for real. Okay? She told me she didn’t care if I wasn’t even married, just get her some gaddamn grandkids. But seriously, I’m saving myself.” As Betty started to giggle, Jacqui said, “Stop laughing! I’m serious! Can I finish? Damn! I’m saving myself emotionally. I’m just not gonna give myself to all these sweet dick Negroes anymore. Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy a good piece of—”
    â€œJacqui!”
    â€œLet me finish, please. When you start saying you