Tiredness Kills - A Zombie Tale Read Free Page B

rather excited (but otherwise unremarkable) Volvo driver heading
towards Kings Norton.

 
    All units were now headed in
this direction, and although there was a short delay in the footage, the net
was closing in very nicely. A running commentary was being fed to the drivers
of the police cars, which included the information that a heavy duty
specialised vehicle had been dispatched to collect a certain substance, and
that the fugitive Chris Richards was to be apprehended at all costs!!!   Even the words 'dead or alive'
got a mention.

 
      Suddenly the excitement was audible, as a
high- pitched voice announced that fugitive Richards had been picked up on the
CCTV system that was operating outside the Masshouse pub.   It had been fitted there mainly due to the
large number of complaints received from nearby residents on account of it's
extremely rowdy reputation and three murders- and, in this case rather handy,
as it lead to a rather astonished janitor being accosted from behind whilst
still being in the process of raising a glass of Black and Tan to his lips.
Outside, the other officers were searching the car park for a Volvo that was
most definitely not there, and looking quite perplexed about it.

 
    Officer Rumbulled was very
glad to have his arms around Chris Richards. He had been anticipating a chase
through council estate back alleys and had not been relishing the thought during
the high- speed drive in which he'd had time to remember the extra couple of
stone that he hadn't lost yet. 'Damn criminals!' he thought.
     
    As Chris sat in the police
car, shaking his sorry head and being in a lot less shock than he should have
been considering the enormity of this crime, he looked up at Rumbulled, who
appeared to be on a loop screaming “WHERE IS IT? WHERE IS IT? WHERE IS IT?”

 
    Chris, who now had a face
covered in officer spittle, was just contemplating feigning wide- eyed
innocence, when a loud voice boomed over the radio waves “All units to Hopwood
Park service station. M42. We've found the Volvo!”

 
    “What shall we do with him?”
asked Jones, Rumbulled's partner, cocking his head towards Chris.

 
    “No time to search him now.
Let's get car and criminal together and take it from there. Where the feck is
Hopwood?”

 
      “ Nooooo worries, Pardner ,” said Jones in his best American side kick accent.
“I was involved in a documentary called 'Motorway Cops' filmed there last year!
Hold on to your coffee and bagels. We're hittin ' the
blues and two's!”

 
 
 
           

Sex Panther?

 
      Ant was   just finishing the remnants of his breakfast, 'The Ultimate' (being
careful not to drop any of it down the rented tuxedo suit that he was still
wearing), and draining the last drops of his Espresso Macchiato when he decided
he couldn't last another minute without poring over the spoils from Scott's
trip to the Gadget Show. After all, Scott was taking far too long in the
breakfast queue ordering a second portion of his beloved hash browns. I mean...
come on, do hash browns really merit a place on a breakfast plate?

 
    Out of the corner of his eye,
Ant witnessed a small altercation involving Scott and a scruffy youth wearing a
blue hoodie who had appeared to have violently shoved Scott out of the way as
he ran through the restaurant. Scott returned to the table slightly shaken and
tightly gripping the plate that contained the extra delicacies.

 
      “Did you see that?” spluttered Scott
incredulously. “Stupid stoned little chav nearly made me drop my hash browns!”

 
    “ Woah !”
said Ant ignoring Scott's indignation and instead throwing his energy into
removing things from bags. “You beauty! You've only managed to bag the almost
un- baggable Wolverine claws!” said Ant, his eyes
shining.

 
    The previous little 'tussle'
was wiped from his mind, as Scott was suddenly taken back to some hours before
when he had stood wearing the claws, as a small crowd had