father,â I said.
After a few minutes, Danny said, âYou want me to see if heâs still there?â He stood up. âWhat does he look like?â
âTall,â I said. âHeâs wearing a dark gray suit.â
âI donât know.â
I stood up. We were safe.
At the station wagon, I noticed that Albertâs paws were muddy, and I wiped them with a rag.
Danny took the rag and wiped the mud off my sandals and pulled a blade of grass out from between my toes.
When he opened the door to the synagogue for me, I thought he was going to ask for my address so he could write to me, but all he said was, âThanks for the cigarettes.â
I was relieved and then disappointed.
In the hall, Alyssa rushed up to him and said, âMy dadâs here.â She glared at me. I wondered if she was his girlfriend, or wanted to be; it was one or the other.
Danny didnât seem to care that she was angry. He said, âSee ya,â to me, and followed her out to the parking lot.
Downstairs, in the pink palace, Robert and Jack were sitting with my father at a table that had been cleared of everything, including the centerpiece.
My father said, âLet your mother know weâre going, please,â and I walked over to where she stood with a woman wearing a big-brimmed straw hat with a beige ribbon.
âThis is my daughter, Sophie,â my mom said, in her fakest voice of the day.
The woman said, âAnd how old are you?â
âTwelve,â I said.
She cooed at this impressive accomplishment. âAnd when is your bat mitzvah?â
I was about to say that I wasnât having one when my mother cut in and said, âWeâre just planning it now.â
I was shocked to hear my mother lie, but I didnât give her away. I remembered a cliché that seemed to fit: âRebecca will be a hard act to follow.â
The woman tittered, and said, âSheâs darling.â
. . . . .
At the car, my mother told me to sit up front and didnât speak again until we were on the highway. âWhere were you?â
âWalking Albert,â I said.
âShe was walking Albert,â Robert repeated, in my defense.
Without turning around, my mother said, âIâm talking to Sophie, Robert.â To me, she said, âYou were gone for over an hour.â
I was wondering what she suspected, and then I realized that she didnât suspect anything, she was just angry that Iâd disappeared. âIt wasnât like anyone missed my company,â I said. âNo one at my table would even talk to me.â
She said, âThatâs not the point.â
We passed three exits before she told me what her point was. I was a guest, she said; I was a member of this family. She kept talking, but whatever she was angry about wasnât making it into her lecture.
I knew that eventually I would have to say I was sorry, even if I didnât know why I should be and wasnât. Until I said it, my mother would go on talking and get angrier until she became tired and hurt, at which point my father would take over.
âIâm sorry,â I said.
My mother kissed me. âI know you are.â
It felt a little less crowded up front then. My mother said what a wonderful job Rebecca had done and then, almost to herself, said she hadnât even started to plan my bat mitzvah.
I looked at my mother. I looked at my dad. It had all been decided. I couldnât argue; I was supposed to be remorseful.
At a gas station, I climbed into the way back with Albert, where I closed my eyes and thought about Danny. I didnât remember being queasy or afraid. I remembered him taking my hand. I thought of him saying, âI canât believe summerâs over,â which I heard now as a declaration of love.
. . . . .
I came home from my first day of getting lost at Flynn Junior High to the news that I had been enrolled in the