The Summer of Sir Lancelot Read Free Page A

Spratt.‘
    ‘How do you do? I am Mr Chadwick. You seem quite an expert,‘ he added admiringly, as his fellow-fisherman deftly sorted out the coils.
    ‘Not the first time I‘ve had my fingers on a length of nylon thread,‘ Sir Lancelot returned a shade smugly. ‘I happen to be a surgeon.‘
    ‘Of course, of course.‘ The birdlike head gave a few pecks. ‘The Admiral did mention it.‘
    ‘You are staying at Trafalgar Lodge for a day or two?‘ inquired Sir Lancelot, leading up to frontier demarcation.
    Mr Chadwick gave a beaky smile.
    ‘A week?‘ demanded Sir Lancelot more shortly. ‘Even a month?‘ he added anxiously.
    The little man laughed. ‘Dear me, longer than that.‘
    Sir Lancelot glared. ‘I must say, the Admiral is extremely generous in his hospitality.‘
    ‘But the Admiral has left.‘
    ‘Left?‘
    ‘For Madeira,‘ explained the intruder mildly. ‘He seems to think the move would benefit both his chest and his income tax. I have bought the property.‘
    ‘Bought it!‘
    Sir Lancelot‘s face took on the expression of a well-established bulldog eyeing the new postman.
    ‘Yes, my business activities have become much less these days, and I wanted to pass such time as may be left to me quietly fishing. I really couldn‘t resist the property — though the Admiral drives a hard bargain, dear me, a very hard bargain indeed — when I found it included this delightful Witches‘ Pool.‘
    ‘This-‘ Sir Lancelot quivered to his rod-tip ‘-happens to be my Witches‘ Pool.‘
    ‘Oh, dear me, no,‘ countered Mr Chadwick calmly. ‘I agree that for many years you left the Admiral under that impression, but I have been through the deeds carefully and there can be no mistake. No mistake,‘ he repeated, flicking his fly across the river, ‘whatsoever.‘
    For some moments Sir Lancelot stood with his beard moving violently, but the sound had apparently broken down.
    ‘I intend to consult my solicitors,‘ he managed to get out at last.
    ‘I should be glad for your peace of mind if you would.‘ Mr Chadwick seemed unruffled by this well-flung gauntlet. ‘Though I fear they will provide you with only the same opinion.‘
    ‘Damn you, man!‘ thundered the surgeon. ‘I‘ll take you to court.‘
    The bird‘s eyes blinked mildly. ‘I trust you will not think me discourteous if I say the prospect fails to alarm me.‘
    ‘I‘ve fished this ruddy pool every summer holiday since I bought the house.‘ The flies on Sir Lancelot‘s cap danced a brisk fandango. ‘I‘ll have you know I‘m not used to being contradicted, particularly by every blasted trespasser — ‘
    ‘Ah, my guest of the morning,‘ Mr Chadwick interrupted, as though Sir Lancelot were some noisy but passing irritation like a wasp. ‘Dear me, what a coincidence! My visitor is in the same profession as yourself. Dr Tolly, I‘d like you to meet Dr Spratt.‘
    ‘It wouldn‘t be “Doctor” it would be “Mister” and anyway it‘s Sir Lancelot,‘ snapped the surgeon.
    ‘G-glad to meet you,‘ said Dr Tolly.
    ‘Why?‘ barked Sir Lancelot.
    ‘Young Dr Tolly has taken over Dr Ewenny‘s practice in the village,‘ Mr Chadwick explained politely. ‘He has already effected an absolutely miraculous cure of my gout.‘
    Sir Lancelot glared at doctor and patient impartially. ‘You don‘t need a miracle to cure gout. You need to cut down on the port.‘
    ‘But I drink only hock and soda-water,‘ objected Mr Chadwick mildly. ‘Then it‘s probably the wrong diagnosis. Tolly? Tolly? I know you.‘ The meteorology of Sir Lancelot‘s thunderous brow worsened further. ‘I examined you in your surgery finals last year, didn‘t I?‘
    ‘That‘s... that‘s right, sir.‘
    ‘You were the candidate who, when I asked the cause of this sinus scar on my own forehead, answered, “It‘s your leucotomy, sir”?‘
    ‘I -1 was flustered, Sir Lancelot,‘ agreed Dr Tolly, turning pink.
    The glance which Sir Lancelot focused on him