canât! Iâd die on the way, you know I would. Itâs worse than January. The dogs are sticking to the sidewalks. Iâd die.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
Very well, Iâll go.
SABINA:
Even more distraught, coming forward and sinking on her knees.
Youâd never come back alive; weâd all perish; if you werenât here, weâd just perish. How do we know Mr. Antrobusâll be back? We donât know. If you go out, Iâll just kill myself.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
Get up, Sabina.
SABINA:
Every night itâs the same thing. Will he come back safe, or wonât he? Will we starve to death, or freeze to death, or boil to death or will we be killed by burglars? I donât know why we go on living. I donât know why we go on living at all. Itâs easier being dead.
She flings her arms on the table and buries her head in them. In each of the succeeding speeches she flings her head upâand sometimes her handsâthen quickly buries her head again.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
The same thing! Always throwing up the sponge, Sabina. Always announcing your own death. But give you a new hatâor a plate of ice creamâor a ticket to the movies, and you want to live forever.
SABINA:
You donât care whether we live or die; all you care about is those children. If it would be any benefit to them youâd be glad to see us all stretched out dead.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
Well, maybe I would.
SABINA:
And what do they care about? Themselvesâthatâs all they care about.
Shrilly.
They make fun of you behind your back. Donât tell me: theyâre ashamed of you. Half the time, they pretend theyâre someone elseâs children. Little thanks you get from them.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
Iâm not asking for any thanks.
SABINA:
And Mr. Antrobusâyou donât understand him. All that work he doesâtrying to discover the alphabet and the multiplication table. Whenever he tries to learn anything you fight against it.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
Oh, Sabina, I know you.
When Mr. Antrobus raped you home from your Sabine hills, he did it to insult me.
He did it for your pretty face, and to insult me.
You were the new wife, werenât you?
For a year or two you lay on your bed all day and polished the nails on your hands and feet.
You made puff-balls of the combings of your hair and you blew them up to the ceiling.
And I washed your underclothes and I made you chicken broths.
I bore children and between my very groans I stirred the cream that youâd put on your face.
But I knew you wouldnât last.
You didnât last.
SABINA:
But it was I who encouraged Mr. Antrobus to make the alphabet. Iâm sorry to say it, Mrs. Antrobus, but youâre not a beautiful woman, and you can never know what a man could do if he tried. Itâs girls like I who inspire the multiplication table.
Iâm sorry to say it, but youâre not a beautiful woman, Mrs. Antrobus, and thatâs the Godâs truth.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
And you didnât lastâyou sank to the kitchen. And what do you do there? You let the fire go out!
No wonder to you it seems easier being dead.
Reading and writing and counting on your fingers is all very well in their way,âbut I keep the home going.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
âThereâs that dinosaur on the front lawn again.âShoo! Go away. Go away.
The baby DINOSAUR puts his head in the window.
DINOSAUR:
Itâs cold.
MRS. ANTROBUS:
You go around to the back of the house where you belong.
DINOSAUR:
Itâs cold.
The DINOSAUR disappears. MRS. ANTROBUS goes calmly out.
SABINA slowly raises her head and speaks to the audience. The central portion of the center wall rises, pauses, and disappears into the loft.
SABINA:
Now that you audience are listening to this, too, I understand it a little better.
I wish eleven oâclock were here; I donât want to be dragged through this whole play again.
The TELEGRAPH BOY is seen entering along the back