The Scarlet Letter Scandal Read Free Page B

to help fill a few orders for me this weekend before she opens the coffee shop so I could close the bakery. I needed a change of scenery in the worst way.”
    “I don’t even know what to say, I’m just so sorry,” said Eva, standing. “We talked on the phone and text messaged, but this is the first I’ve seen you.” She walked over to Lisa’s chair. “I’ve been thinking about you.”
    Lisa stood up and let Eva hug her.
    “I’m so sorry about the baby, Lis,” said Maggie, standing too and adding, “Group hug.”
    The three women stood for a moment embracing as Lisa sniffed back tears. She pulled her blond ponytail back together, patting her creased shorts so she had something to do with her hands. She fought back more tears, struggling not to fall into a cavern of open grief. She knew how hard it was to come back once you allowed yourself a full-on crying jag.
    Lisa picked up her wine glass again, sipped, and sat down. Maggie and Eva followed suit, sitting and reaching for their own glasses.
    “I lost a baby once,” said Eva. “I don’t really talk about it that much, but I want you to know I understand. It’s so awful. No one knows what to say and everyone says the wrong thing and there’s nothing anyone could say to make you feel better anyway. I’m sorry.”
    “I’m sorry too,” said Maggie. “When my son died as a baby I thought for sure the universe had conspired to punish me for something. What God would let a baby die? I’ve been thinking about you and I’m so sorry you’ve had to go through this after all the effort you and Jim have put in.”
    “It’s been devastating,” said Lisa. “I had seen the heartbeat on the ultrasound monitor so I thought…”
    Lisa sipped her wine, even though her lips and her hands were trembling. She picked up a few grapes from the table and put them in her mouth. She wasn’t hungry, but she knew eating them would give her a minute to try to compose herself, since she didn’t know if she could speak. Something about the salty air and the breeze and the sunset made her feel welcome to open up the waterworks and let herself cry for hours, but she didn’t want to do that in front of her friends regardless of how understanding she knew they’d be, and she doubted she had that many tears left anyway.
    “I blamed myself,” said Eva. “I hope you’re not doing that. I didn’t even really have a reason to, but I figured it must have been something I did. I drank wine or ran on the treadmill before I knew I was pregnant, so it must have been something like that. No matter how many times the doctor told me it wasn’t something I could have prevented, I felt like it was.”
    “I’ve blamed myself, too,” said Lisa. “I guess I never told you both about it, but I guess you remember Ben, my graphic designer crush, the one I pretended to be sleeping with so I could be in the Scarlet Letter Society?”
    “Of course,” said Maggie. “You had imaginary sex with him under a covered bridge.”
    “Well, one night just before I ended our flirtation or friendship or whatever it was, we did actually kiss,” said Lisa.
    “Oh no,” said Eva. “You do not mean to tell me that you think you lost the baby you’ve been wanting for the last five years because you kissed someone besides your husband?”
    “Oh, Christ,” said Maggie. “Say it ain’t so. You never even slept with him!”
    “I know it doesn’t make any sense,” said Lisa. “It’s just that Jim and I are in a better place now and we worked so hard to get pregnant, I just thought somehow I was being punished for even thinking of sleeping with another man. I know it’s ridiculous.”
    “Sweetie, I’m no churchgoer, but I don’t think God punishes people for being human,” said Maggie. She put down her wine glass, tucking her unruly auburn curls back inside her vintage Boston Red Sox baseball cap and picking up a piece of cheese and some almonds. “Isn’t he the one who made us human in