The Miraculous Makeover of Lizard Flanagan Read Free Page B

“Okay, but just for a minute.”
    I walked to the window and took a deep breath of air.
    Ed put up his hand. “Me, too?”
    â€œHow about a gas mask?” Tom Luther said from across the room.
    Everybody cracked up except Chris, who glared at me and hurried back to her chair.
    â€œ Christine? ” said Nathan, reading her name off the board. “You’re Christine this year?”
    â€œYeah,” Chris snapped. “You have a problem with that, Nathan?”
    I looked at Chris. Last year she’d aimed a spoonful of mashed potatoes halfway across the cafeteria and scored a direct hit on Tiffany Brady. Now she was almost acting like Tiffany. Why would Chris start dowsing herself with perfume and want to be called Christine? Normally, she would’ve decked Nathan Morgan for teasing her. And what was this Nathan stuff? Last year he was Morgan. She sure had changed over the summer.
    â€œReady for lunch?” Ed asked me after class.
    â€œYeah,” I said. “You too?”
    â€œYeah. Man, I’m hungry!”
    I grinned at him. “You’re always hungry, Mechtensteimer.”
    We walked down the crowded hall, getting jostled on all sides. A bright-red poster welcoming everyone back to school was on the wall near the entrance to the cafeteria. Next to it was another poster announcing a Welcome to Truman Middle School dance for sixth graders. It seemed as if there were posters everywhere. I’d already seen them advertising the chess club, the math club, and tryouts for the fall play.
    â€œHey, Lizard!” Zach was standing with Stinky at the cafeteria door. He grinned at me. “You guys eat now?”
    â€œYeah.”
    â€œGreat.”
    â€œAt least we have lunch together,” I said.
    We left our books on a table in the middle of the room and got in line behind Mike Herman and Andy Walinsky.
    â€œSo who’s going to win the World Series?” Mike said.
    â€œAtlanta,” Andy said.
    â€œThe Cardinals,” said Stinky.
    â€œIt doesn’t matter who’s going to win the World Series,” I said. “What’s important is who the best team is.”
    â€œUh-oh,” Ed said. “Don’t get Lizard started on baseball. She’s obsessed with the Cubs.”
    I ignored him. “The Chicago Cubs aren’t getting to the World Series, but they’re still the best all-around team in the country.”
    Stinky snorted. “Yeah, right! If the Cubs are so good, why haven’t they been in the top of their division for the last hundred years? If a team is good, they’ll get to the World Series at some point.”
    â€œYou’re full of it, Stinky,” I said. “Look at their long-term record. Look at Edwin Jackson. His fastball averages 95 miles an hour! And Starlin Castro’s always a crowd favorite. In his very first game he set a record for RBIs in a major league debut!”
    â€œYeah,” Zach said. “The World Series doesn’t take underdog victories into account, either. Lizard’s right. You’ve got to look at the long-term record of the team.”
    â€œWhat are we eating today?” I asked her.
    â€œYour choice,” she said. “Sloppy joes, pizza, or macaroni and cheese.”
    â€œMy brother told me the only good food here is the pizza,” Stinky said.
    The woman scowled at him.
    I took a yellow tray and walked down the line while the women behind the counter served up my food. They handed me the plate at the end of the line, and I went back to our lunch table.
    â€œThe Yankees are my team,” Ed said. “If you want to talk long-term record, look at CC Sabathia.”
    I turned to him. “Sabathia has had physical problems, though. And his velocity has decreased.”
    â€œSo what?”
    I scooped up a spoonful of apple salad and glanced over at the next table. Ginger Flush sat with the beautiful blonde girl who’d stared at Zach before