the police?â
âWellâI shouldnât think so yet, but if it will ease your mind, have a word with them. I wishââ
âYes?â
âNever mind,â said Ralph gruffly.
âBut I do mind.â
âThen I wish you were jumping for joy because he was late, and you were having an evening on your own.â
âItâsâPeter.â
âIsnât he asleep yet?â
âYes, butââ
âYou know, darling, the trouble is that itâs too much of a strain. Iâve noticed it lately. Youâre jumpy and edgy most of the time, living with him is getting on your nerves. That, and not living with me. Donât go on too long, sweet. I know you think heâd never divorce you, but you canât be sure with the righteous. Heâll probably call you a scarlet woman, andâoh, Iâm sorry. But you know how I feel.â
âYes, darling,â said Muriel. âI think Iâll wait until midnight, and if he isnât back then, call the police.â
âDo that,â said Ralph.
Â
She went upstairs to Peterâs room. He was sleeping on his back, had a lovely colour, and looked fit and strong. His curly hair was rumpled; both the girls had straight hair. Peter had the good looks, too, although none of the children were really plain. She stood looking at him for several minutes, then went downstairs. She had never known such a long evening. She poured herself out another gin and orange, and tried to read, but couldnât settle. Time passed so slowly. She was torn between the two attractions: home and Peter, and Ralph. It was easy to understand why Ralph was so impatient; an intolerable situation had been going on for three years. Few men would have been as patient as Ralph; heâd given devotion and in return received â nothing. Practically nothing, anyhow. He was right, too, it was a great strain.
She jumped up and looked in the mirror.
When heâd said that she was jumpy and edgy, it had hurt; it hurt now. She studied her face, the face of an attractive woman of thirty-eight. Of course, she didnât look like a girl, there were a few lines on her forehead and in the corners of her eyes, but â she didnât look old. Did she? There were two streaks of grey in her dark hair, and she wouldnât have her hair dyed. Was she foolish? Had Ralph really meant that she was losing her looks?
No, heâd just meant what he had said, she was edgy under the strain of it. She couldnât go on. He wanted her to tell Wilfred, had been begging her to, for nearly two years. Only Peter had stopped her. Ralph hadnât much money, otherwise he would probably have been more insistent. Money!
Peter would probably begin to notice that things were wrong. He was old for his years; too old.
She turned away from the mirror and went to the front door, but there was no sign of the car.
Probably it was a good thing that this had happened when George and Mary, the servants, were out. They would be out all night, theyâd taken the job on condition that they could leave after lunch on Wednesday and not return until after breakfast on Thursday; they were such excellent workers that it would have been folly to complain. Usually she enjoyed the greater freedom; and Wednesday afternoons were often the afternoons of the week.
Ralphâ
She shivered, because it was cold, and went back to the fire.
Â
It was twenty minutes to twelve.
The fire was low, and she put several logs on and watched them blaze and heard them crackle. Usually they would have been on much earlier, Wilfred would rub his hands in front of them and say âThereâs nothing like a log fire, Mew,â at least three times. In some moods, she would be at screaming point. She felt calmer than she had before, perhaps because it was nearly time to call the police. She would wait until midnight,.now. She relaxed and lay back in her chair, her eyes half