The Burden of Proof Read Free Page B

officers.
    Nogalski had come strolling up as Stern emerged from the hallway. The lieutenant wanted to know what the policemen had been doing. Nogalski spoke. The others knew they had no place to answer.
    "I was asking a few questions, Lieutenant."
    "Think you've asked enough?" Nogalski took a beat on that.
    They did not get along, the detective and the lieutenant-you could see that. "Maybe you could lend a hand outside.
    There's a real bunch of gawkers."
    When the other officers were gone, the lieutenant gestured for Stern. He knocked at the door with the back of his hand so that it closed part way.
    "Well, you got.a shitpot of troubles here, don't you, Sandy? I'm sorry to see you again, under the circumstances." The lieutenant's name was Radczyk, Stern remembered suddenly. Ray, he thought. "You holdin' up?" he asked.
    "For the time being. My son is having some difficulty, The prospect of an autopsy for some reason upsets him." The cop, shifting around the room, seemed to shrug. "We find a note someplace, we could do without it, I guess. I could probably fix it up with Russell's office." He was referring to the coroner. "They can always measure the C. O. in the blood." The old policeman looked at Stern directly then, aware probably that he was being too graphic. "I owe, you know," he said.
    Stern nodded. He had no idea what Radczyk was talking about.
    The policeman sat down.
    "The fellas go over all the usual with you?" He nodded again. Whatever that was. "They were very thorough," said Stern. The lieutenant understood at once.
    "Nogalski's okay. He pushes, he's okay. Rough around the edges." The lieutenant looked out the door. He was the type someone must have called a big oaf when he was younger, Before he had a badge and a gun.
    "It's a tough thing. I feel terrible for you. Just come home and found her, right?"
    The lieutenant was doing it all again. He was just much better at it than Nogalski.
    "She sick?" the lieutenant asked.
    "Her health was excellent. The usual middle-age complaints.
    One of her knees was quite arthritic. She could not garden as much as she liked. Nothing else." From the study window, Stern could see the neighbors parting to let the ambulance pass. It rolled slowly through the crowd. The beacon, Stern noticed, was not turning. No point to that. He watched until the vehicle carrying Clara had disappeared in the fullness of the apple tree, just coming to leaf, at the far corner of the lot, then he brought himself back to the conversation. The left knee, Stern thought.
    "You don't know of any reason?"
    "Lieutenant, it should be evident that I failed to observe something I should have." He expected to get through this, but he did not. His voice quaked and he closed his eyes.
    The thought of actually breaking down before this policeman revolted him, but something in him was bleeding away. He was going to say that he had much to regret right now. But he was sure he could not muster that with any dignity. He said, "I am sorry, I cannot help you."
    Radczyk was studying him, trying to decide, in all likelihood, if Stern was telling the truth.
    A policeman leaned into the room through the half-open door.
    "Lieutenant, Nogalski asked me to tell you they found something. Up in the bedroom. He didn't want to touch it till you seen it."
    "What is that?" asked Stern.
    The cop looked at Stern, unsure if he should answer. "The note," the officer said at last.
    It was them on Stern's highboy, jotted on. a single sheet of her stationery, laid out beside a pile of handkerchiefs which the housekeeper had ironed. Like the grocery list or a reminder to get the cleaning. Unassuming. Harmless. Stern picked up the sheet, overcome by this evidence of her' presence. The lieutenant stood at his shoulder. But them was very little to see. Just one line. No date. No salutation. Only four words.
    "Can you forgive me?"
    ON the dark early morning the day of the funeral, a dream seized Stern from sleep. He was wandering in a large