Tap Out

Tap Out Read Free Page B

Book: Tap Out Read Free
Author: Eric Devine
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garbage out, since I couldn’t last night. I slide into my shoes and goose bumps rise along my arms because of the chill in the air, but from something else, too. The echo of his voice saying my name.
    The shit hole is the same, disheveled. I head down the hall, past my mother’s room and into the kitchen, where I tie up the bag, then hesitate before unlocking the door. Did I really stand up to him last night? Lock him out? Fuck, I did. Shit, what the fuck was I thinking? This is gonna get ugly. But if I want something better, something more than this, maybe it has to get ugly first?
    Outside is damp and cool. I shiver and walk around back to the can. A fly darts off my ear and I swipe at him. Then another. The fuck? The bag bounces off my calf, and the stench hits me. “Shit!” I toss the bag to the ground, and it joins the shredded mess. The can’s been dumped and the
bags ripped. Cameron’s stomped on the contents, so wrappers and food are half buried in the ground or mashed to a pulp. Flies pour out of a Styrofoam carton. I step away and slip on something black and greasy. The stench overwhelms me, and I head back inside.
    The door slams behind me, and a moan comes from my mom’s room. I don’t give a fuck if I’ve woken her up. I first wipe off my sneaker on the doormat and then grab the dustpan and another garbage bag from the cabinet. When I turn she’s leaning on her doorframe.
    â€œWhat’s up?” She pulls on the ends of her extra long T-shirt. Her hair’s a tangle and looks unwashed, and the greased pattern it falls into does not cover the bruises from last night. They’re as bad as ever, and I feel ashamed for being pissed with her.
    â€œNuthin’. Taking out the trash.”
    â€œOh.” She looks away, as if somewhere far. Like we’ve got a double-wide or some shit.
    â€œYeah. Cam fucked it up out there. Needs to be cleaned.” I don’t know if I expect her to do something because I’ve said this or that I wish she had done something differently so that I wouldn’t have to take care of this, but either way, I’m still pissed. “ Somebody’s gotta do it.” My voice doesn’t seem to register with her. She just keeps staring.
    â€œOh. Okay,” she finally says and turns back into her room and snaps the door in place.
    â€œStupid bitch.” I say it low, to my chest, and it makes my face hot. I know Cam did this, not her, but in a way she’s responsible. She brought him onto the scene. I know I wasn’t just talking about cleaning up this mess. There’s so much that needs to be done, but who’s going to do it? Fuck, I can’t go there right now. I head out the door and set to work.

    I dry heave once, but manage to get the shit into the bag, and then the can out to the road. Cameron did this once over the summer. It was the first sign that things were turning between them. June was a scorcher, hot and humid, so by the time I got to the garbage, maggots were crawling everywhere, and I did hurl, and then had to clean that up. At least this isn’t as bad.
    I head back in and go right to the shower. The water takes a while to heat, so I sit on the toilet and wait. Six months. She’s been with this douche for half a year, which means she’ll go back and forth for another three months before she dumps him. Or he puts her in the hospital. Same as with Karl. And Steve. And Jake. And all the rest whose names I can’t remember. Or just won’t. Oh yeah, and Number One himself, Tony Senior. I wish she could just . . . fuck, there’s just too much I wish she’d do.
    I shower, scrub until it hurts and my skin is red, but I don’t mind the pain. It’s only superficial. I dress in a plain gray tee and my black jeans, cuffed at the ends because they’re too long. I slide my sneakers back on, making sure all of whatever the fuck I stepped in is gone, and then throw

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