Swag Read Free Page B

paper, not much, there’s no excitement in it. Christ, it’s like work. No, I’m talking about going out and picking up some dough. You know how many ways you can do that?”
    â€œI don’t know—auto theft, B and E, burglary, strongarm—” Stick paused. “There’s probably a hundred ways. Some that haven’t even been thought up yet.”
    â€œWhat you mentioned, you’re talking about things you can take,” Frank said. “Yes, cars, TVs, silverware, fur coats, household shit. But you got to convert it into money, right? You’ve got to sell it to somebody, and he knows you didn’t get the stuff laying around your basement or out in the garage.”
    â€œIt’s unavoidable if you got to fence it.”
    â€œThat’s what I’m talking about,” Frank said. “The thing you do first, you eliminate the secondary party. You only take money. And money you can get rid of anywhere. Man, you spend it.”
    â€œSo then you’re into mugging, strong-arm, I mentioned that,” Stick paused. “Bank robbery—is that what you want to do, rob a bank?”
    Frank looked around and then at Stick again. “I’ll tell you something. Nobody’s going to rob banks as a career and get rich and stay out of jail. Not both. Not with the time locks, the alarm systems. The teller doesn’t even have to press a button. You lift the money out of the drawer and a bell rings at the Holmes Protection Agency. They got the TV cameras. You pull a gun, you’re on instant replay. The odds are lousy, less than fifty-fifty. Like the average take on a bank job in New York City last year was eleven thousand two. Not bad. But those are the guys that got away. Half the clowns didn’t make it.”
    Frank paused to draw on his cigarette and take a drink. “Let me ask you something. What do you think pays the most? Wait a minute, let me rephrase it. What do you think is the fastest and, percentagewise, safest way to make the most money?”
    â€œNot the horses,” Stick said. “I used to spend weekends I wasn’t working at Gulfstream or Hialeah.”
    â€œNo, not the horses,” Frank said patiently. “Think about it. What’s the fastest and relatively safest way to do it?”
    Stick was thoughtful. “Big payoff? Maybe kidnapping.”
    Frank was losing some of his patience. “Christ no, not kidnapping. FBI, you don’t have a fucking chance kidnapping.”
    â€œAre we talking about something I never heard of?”
    â€œYou heard of it.”
    â€œAll right,” Stick said, “you tell me. What’s the best way to make a lot of money fast? Without working, that is.”
    Frank held up the palm of his hand, his elbow on the edge of the bar. “You ready for this?”
    â€œI’m ready.”
    â€œArmed robbery.”
    â€œBig fucking deal.”
    â€œSay it again,” Frank said, “and put it in capital letters and underline it. Say it backwards, robbery comma armed. Yes, it can be a very big deal. Listen, last year there were twenty-three thousand and thirty-eight reported robberies in the city of Detroit. Reported. That’s everything. B and E, muggings, banks, everything. Most of them pulled by dummies, junkies, and still a high percentage got away with it.”
    â€œGoing in with a gun,” Stick said, “is something else.”
    â€œYou bet it is.” Frank leaned in a little closer. “Ernie . . . Ernest—”
    â€œStick.”
    â€œStick . . . I’m talking about simple everyday armed robbery. Supermarkets, bars, liquor stores, gas stations, that kind of place. Statistics show—man, I’m not just saying it, the statistics show—armed robbery pays the most for the least amount of risk. Now, you ready for this? I see how two guys who know what they’re doing and ’re businesslike about