Stork Naked Read Free Page B

and—
    “Darn!” she swore under her breath. The horror of her loss had sneaked up on her.
    “Oooo, what you said!” Ted said, scraping one forefinger against the other.
    “Mustn't swear in the presence of children,” Monica informed her imperiously. But she couldn't hold her severe expression long, and dissolved into giggles.
    “She misspoke,” the peeve said. “That word is not a full cuss. What she really meant was—”
    “On,” Surprise said sharply, cutting off the bird while herding them to the drawbridge. Probably it had not really been about to violate the Conspiracy, but she couldn't take the risk.
    A man was crossing the bridge, going the other way. His nose was bright blue. “Hey, pinkeye,” the peeve called. “Whatcha poke your nose into?”
    But the man was not annoyed. “I came to see the Good Magician to learn how to nullify my blue nose. But the Gorgon knew the answer and gave it to me free: I have only to drink the liquid of the beer barrel tree. So now I don't have to serve a year for my answer.”
    “Well bully for you, beer belly!” the peeve said. But the man was so pleased with his free answer that he still wasn't annoyed. The peeve was, though; it hated to have insults fall flat.
    “Maybe you'll get your Answer free, too,” Ted said.
    “I doubt it,” Surprise said. “But it really doesn't matter. I'll pay whatever I need to, to get my baby back.”
    “I guess that answer stunk your britches,” Monica told Ted, putting him in his place as usual. Then she turned momentarily thoughtful. “You know, a nice talent would be the ability to grant wishes, but only for those who have wishes for others and don't know they'll be granted.”
    “Princess Ida's already got that, dodo,” Ted said witheringly.
    Monica refused to wither. “It's not the same. If I had that talent, and you wished for Surprise to get her baby back, I could grant it, if you didn't know my talent.”
    “What dope would grant a wish for someone else?”
    “Enough, children,” Surprise said. “I think we're somewhere, and I want to concentrate.”
    The bridge debouched at a garden outside the main castle gate. It was filled with trees of different types. They grew so close together and branched so thickly that it was impossible to pass them to get to the castle gate. So this was the second Challenge.
    “Aw, who cares about stupid trees,” Ted said snidely. “They have wood for brains.”
    A branch lifted, sprouting big sharp thorns. “Stay out of this,” Surprise said. “It's my Challenge. I may be disqualified if you participate.”
    “Awww.”
    “Why do you have to see the old gnome anyway?” Monica demanded. “This is dull.”
    “If you brats don't shut up, she'll change her mind and take you home before seeing the grumpy gnome,” the peeve warned. “She knows she should have done that before coming here.”
    Both children went seriously silent. They did not want to miss the action. “Thank you peeve,” Surprise said. That shut the bird up too; it wasn't used to being appreciated, and wasn't sure how to handle it.
    Now she addressed the crowded copse. It was clear she couldn't simply pick up any of the trees to clear her way, but there had to be a way to nullify their opposition. What could it be? They were all different types, no two the same. Was that a hint? But it hardly seemed to matter whether the species matched; they were all too solid, and as the thorny branch had shown, capable of opposing any effort to pass them.
    She pondered, cogitated, considered, contemplated, and finally thought about it. Again she was reminded of how little actual thinking she had done in the past. Her magic had taken care of most things, and her parents Grundy and Rapunzel had handled the rest. But now she had no choice.
    She couldn't think of a sensible idea, so she tried a nonsensical one.
    “Who are you?” she asked the trees. Of course she got no answer. But that gave her a better idea. Maybe she was