even more weirdly
comfortable, to be around people who knew that Jaxon and I were into each other
without making a big deal about it. Jaxon held my hand, or touched me, or
kissed me—nothing too aggressive, but enough to give me a tingle and to make me
hopeful for even more later .
It was so exciting—even more exciting in some ways
than our secret relationship might have been if we had been forced to keep it
that way. To know that everyone approved, that I didn’t have to torture myself
anymore, was such a great feeling that I thought I might explode from
happiness.
The night wore on and I got more and more used to
the attitude of acceptance that surrounded us. I went into the kitchen to get
myself another beer, and Jeremy pulled me aside. “Hey, Mia, I just wanted to
say I’m really happy for you.” I blushed a little bit—I remembered Jeremy
telling me weeks before that he didn’t know what was going on between Jaxon and
me, but that he wanted me to hang out with the guys anyway.
“You are?” Jeremy nodded, grinning. He shrugged.
“I mean, don’t take it like I care or anything, but
I couldn’t help noticing how miserable you’ve been.” I rolled my eyes.
“I haven’t been miserable.” Jeremy pinned me down
with a level stare.
“You were miserable. You were avoiding all of us at
one point, remember?” I laughed.
“Oh, right, that.”
“Well, you and Jaxon were both obviously miserable
without each other. Whatever else is going on, and whatever kind of craziness
you’ve got in your lives, it’s obvious you’re really into one another—so when
word got around that you guys had hooked up and were hanging out together, we
were all pretty relieved.”
“I didn’t know you guys really cared about it all
that much.” Jeremy shrugged, looking embarrassed.
“Yeah, well, don’t let anyone else hear about it.
Frat secret. But we care about each other, you know—and you’re pretty much one
of us, so we were all worried about the sitch . It’s
been a long time coming.” I smiled and gave him a playful shove to get away
from me. Jeremy laughed and grabbed his beer, heading back into the living
room, clearly still more than a little embarrassed at how much he had shared.
Of all of the things anyone had said to me that
night about Jaxon and me, it felt good to know that my closest friends in the
frat were actually happy about it. I probably should have known that it would
be only too obvious to everyone we both knew that Jaxon and I were into each
other; but the fact that everyone was so excited for us, that everyone was
actually happy to see us pairing off, was so great. We had taken such an
emotional beating for being together from our parents—it was just such a relief
to be around people who either didn’t care or who thought it was great. I
couldn’t have been happier in my entire life, no matter what else happened to
me.
Chapter
Four
I woke up the next morning feeling even better than
I had the night before, even though I would have never even thought that was
possible. Instead of going back to my dorm at the end of the night, I had ended
up in Jaxon’s bed. We’d both been tipsy—not drunk, just a little buzzed—and
we’d spent the whole day once we’d gotten out of bed teasing each other,
especially at the makeshift party that had gone on in the frat house. The game
had been great—it was another one that no one in the frat had any vested
interest in, just enough going on in it to make it worth watching. Jaxon had
copped feels, waylaid me on the way to the kitchen or to the bathroom or
anywhere else I had gone. By the time he had led me up to his bedroom, refusing
to even entertain the notion of me going back to my dorm, I had been more than
ready to go to bed with him again.
It was so different, to sleep with him with everyone
in the know; it was different in a good way. The first time we’d had sex, on
the couch in the living room, I’d been eager for it—I’d
Dorothy Johnston, Port Campbell Press