Soldier on Her Doorstep Read Free Page A

she’d been out of the game for so long she didn’t even know when a man was checking her out! It felt weird. Not uncomfortable, but not exactly something she was ready for. Although now she’d obviously made him uncomfortable. “I’m sorry, Alex. I was joking.”
    He looked away. “I’m just confused, that’s all.”
    She raised an eyebrow in question.
    Alex sighed and clasped the hot mug.
    â€œWilliam mentioned you were expecting another baby.”
    Uh-huh. The penny dropped. She almost felt disappointed that Alex hadn’t been sizing her up, but then she guessed it wasn’t really appropriate for a widow to get excited about another man anyway. It was just that she hadn’t seen her husband for such a long time, and it had been months since his passing, and she…wanted to feel like a woman again. Not just a widow, or a mother, or a wife. Like a woman.
    It didn’t mean she didn’t love her husband. She did. She had. So much. She blinked the confusion away and smiled reassuringly at Alex, knowing how uncomfortable he mustbe, saying something like that. It wasn’t like she owed him an explanation, but the guy had traveled from heaven only knew where to visit her, to fulfill some dying wish of William’s, and she didn’t mind sharing. Not if it gave him some peace of mind before he left and went back to his own family.
    â€œI fell pregnant when William was home on leave. I had an inkling and took an early test the day before he left.”
    Alex was still blushing. She guessed he wasn’t used to talking pregnancy and babies with another man’s wife. But he’d asked.
    â€œI lost the baby during my first trimester, but I couldn’t quite figure out how to tell William. He was so excited that we were finally having a second child, and he was unsure about being away again. I didn’t want to let him down. But then he died, so he never knew.” Lisa paused. “If I hadn’t lost the baby it would have been born a couple of months ago.”
    She took a sip of coffee and then gazed into the liquid black depths of it. It was still hard talking about William, knowing he wasn’t ever going to be coming back, but she was dealing with it. She felt like the deepest grieving was over, but sometimes it was still hard. Sometimes the sadness was…trying.
    â€œSorry. Time kind of gets away from you when you’re away,” he said.
    Lisa nodded.
    â€œWere you right in not telling him what had happened to the baby?” he asked.
    Alex’s question surprised her. He wasn’t accusing her. Nor offering an opinion. It seemed he was just asking it the way he saw it.
    â€œYeah, I think so.” Her voice sounded weak even to her own ears. “I’m glad he died thinking that I was going to have a baby to love. That Lilly would have a brother or sister.”
    She hadn’t talked about her miscarriage to anyone, really. Not even her mother. It felt good to get it out, especially to someone who wouldn’t make a fuss or make the pain of it come back to her.
    Alex didn’t respond. He’d wanted to know but she guessed he hadn’t banked on hearing that.
    â€œI’m sorry. I mean, I’m just…”
    â€œNot sure what to say?” she finished for him, trying to put him at ease.
    â€œYeah.”
    She nodded. Her usual response would be to touch, to reach for the person she was talking to. But she stopped herself. Alex wasn’t her usual company, and she needed to give him space.
    â€œWould you like something to eat?”
    He shook his head. “No, don’t go to any trouble.”
    Lisa rolled her eyes at him, getting used to his short answers and lack of expression. “I write cookbooks for a living. Believe me when I say that fixing you something to eat is not going to put me in a tailspin.”
    She placed her hands on the bench and caught a smile on Alex’s face.