Sleeping Handsome Read Free Page B

mixed.
    Of
course, my ego doesn’t mind. (Fuck. Maybe I am egotistical.) Each time she
blushes and looks away, it flares like a white head pounding to get free—now
that’s a great simile . But then logic breaks through. How well
does JM know me? So I’m the star running back. So I’m popular. We’ve spoke
about ten words in over three years of high school.   She might as well stare at the posters on her
wall—I’m going to assume she has them—of actors or rock stars because that’s
about how well she knows me. Finally, the whole thing’s kind of… depressing.
I’d like to be the kind of guy who deserves that kind of attention. I even like
the idea of returning her feelings—though there’re not real and I don’t—and
falling into some movie or fairytale where everything’s perfect.
    But
perfect doesn’t exist.
    I
should know.

 
    Like JM, I stare at
him. My eyes narrow on his form. “Guys,” I say in a hiss. “Why didn’t you try
to talk more to her? Give her a chance? It’s not like you’re head over shoes in
love with Melanie. From less than ten journal entries, even I can see that.” I
shove the thought away that JM sounds like someone Amanda, Kelly, and I
terrorize daily.Yet strangely, her
crush reminds me of my own stupid ones. “And you do sound egotistical.” I snap
the journal shut and nearly slam it in between books on the shelf.
    I pull out my phone
from my purse. My time was up over five minutes ago. “Well I gotta go. I don’t
like leaving like this.” I yank my purse from the floor with a violent tug.
“But you’ve got me upset by calling that girl’s feelings unreal. How do you
know her feelings aren’t legit? It’s just like you said earlier. Who knows why
we like certain things or people? Why do guys think they know everything?
Especially when most of them are idiots,” I say under my breath before
standing.
    “I guess I’ll see you
tomorrow.” Without looking back, I move—more like stomp—toward the door. I had
feared that I might want to take the journal home with me and read ahead, but
right now, I want nothing to do with it or him.

~4~

 
 
 
 
    I drop my make-up
bag on the dresser and face the bed. “Okay Zach, I’ve been thinking you were
kind of an egotistical jerk to that JM girl, but I have to admit I can be a
bitch sometimes.” Recalling how Amanda, Kelly, and I treat the girls and even
some of the loser guys in our class, I add, “Well maybe a lot of the time. So I
guess I shouldn’t throw blocks or whatever that saying is and it was kind of
wrong for me to judge you.”
    My
apology has me feeling lighter as I pluck his journal from the shelf. “Last
night was wonderfully boring. I stayed home and played checkers with my little
sister. But tonight, a bunch of us are going out for tapas. Amanda’s idea of
course. We can’t just go to a pizza joint it has to be some fufu thing. She invited Carson probably thinking it will be fun to watch me get
jealous. So I’ll have to act like it, which is going to be fun. I’m going to keep my next interest top secret.” My lips
tighten in a frown. “Well at least until I have him wrapped around my little
finger.”
    I
twist a long strand of hair in between my fingers. “This boyfriend thing is
driving me a little crazy. I haven’t had one since freshman year. I’ve been out
on dates since then, but every time I get close to some guy, Amanda somehow
sabotages it. Really, I’m not boy crazy or anything. I’d just like to have one
dang relationship in high school past the year fourteen.”   I let my hair go with a tug.
    “Anyway,
this,” I lift the journal up, “is far better than a boring old book don’t you
think? I mean books are okay, but you’re way more interesting.” I flip through the pages. “So where were we?” I find the end
of his JM entry. “All right, got it.”  

 
    November
25,

 
    Today
should have been cool.
      No school. Lots of turkey and mash potatoes.
But