Sealed with a Diss Read Free Page B

warned. “
Suitable
ones. No B-listers,” she said, pronouncing the term “blisters.”
    “Or they can go as the Cheetah Girls,” Ponytail scoffed, and then exchanged a high five with Swiss Miss Braids.
    “We
have
boyfriends,” Dylan shouted above their laughter.
    “And even if we broke up with them, we could always find newer, more
suitable
ones like
that
,” Alicia snapped. “Thanks to ESP.”
    The Pretty Committee squealed with delight.
    “Um, reminder.” Skye stepped in from of the screen. “This room isn’t yours until next year. Alicia, Dylan, and Kristen will have to find boyfriends all by themselves.”
    “And if we can’t?” Kristen twisted the pink-and-orange terry Puma sweatband around her wrist.
    “If you
can’t
…” Skye wound her thick blond waves into a high ballerina bun and fastened it with one of her gold bangles. “You cute, itty-bitty little seventh-graders will be forced to walk around my party sucking these.” She held out her hand and Thin-Pin, the DSL Dater with ultra-fine straight blond hair, slapped five pink pacifiers in her palm.
    Alicia, Dylan, and Kristen gasped.
    Massie and Claire exchanged “phew” glances, knowing that their pre-established relationships with Cam and Derrington rendered them automatically immune to the humiliating ultimatum.
    “FYI…” Skye slid the pacifiers onto her fingers, held out her arm, cocked her head, and admired them. “If one of you fails, you all fail.”
    “Wait!” Massie heard herself protest aloud. “That’s not fair.”
    The Pretty Committee gasped again in a thanks-a-lot sort of way.
    “I mean…” Massie giggle-blushed. “This whole
thing
isn’t fair. Everyone will ah-bviously
try
to get dates but if for some reason someone falls through at the last minute, you can’t punish all of—”
    “Do you
all
want access to this room next year?”
    They nodded.
    “Then you will
all
be treated the same.”
    “That’s how it works,” announced Swiss Miss Braids.
    “We had the same rules when we were in the seventh grade,” said Ponytail.
    The other blondes nodded in agreement.
    “No problem.” Massie grinned. “If we got Birkin bags before Mary-Kate and Ashley, we can certainly find a couple of boyfriends.”
    “I like your confidence.” Skye smiled, flashing a row of iPod-white, never-needed-braces teeth.
    Massie half-nodded in thanks.
    “I just hope you’re right, or your lives are going to
suck
.” Skye wiggled her pacifier fingers again, and the DSL Daters cracked up.
    Instantly, the Pretty Committee turned toward Massie, anxious for her to unleash a paralyzing comeback.
    But it was best to hold back. If Skye knew they were worried, it would only increase her alpha power and weaken Massie’s own. Instead, she inhaled, yoga style, focusing on the sharpness of her breath until the sensation calmed her. Finally, she managed a cool smile. “Not a problem—we have more options than Match.com.”
    “I hope so, because the party’s only three weeks away.”
    Skye clapped once, letting everyone know it was time to leave. She pressed her thumb into the remote and flicked off the lights.
    And just like
that,
the Pretty Committee’s excitement faded with the image of the TV screen.
    CURRENT STATE OF THE UNION
IN
OUT
GBS (Gossiping in Bomb Shelters)
GBS (Gossiping in Bathroom Stalls)
ESP
IM
Sucker practice
Soccer practice

W ESTCHESTER , NY
S LICE OF H EAVEN P IZZA S HOP
    Monday, April 12th
    3:58 P.M.
    Outside Slice of Heaven—a windowless brick igloo designed to look like a giant pizza oven—the Pretty Committee re-glossed and finger-combed while Massie twirled her low side-pony and examined their outfits for embarrassing latte stains and outdated accessories.
    As she stood in a cluster to the right of the door, Claire couldn’t help wondering if the other girls knew they were going see the boys after school, because their outfits were all 8.5s or higher, and her ensemble—a faded camo long-sleeved waffle shirt,