SALVE ROMA! A Felidae Novel - U.S. Edition Read Free Page A

the floor so that the smell in the air reminded of a giant just having thrown up here and simultaneously having answered the call of nature. Almost depression-triggering appeared some »toys«, which were dangling from the ceiling like bells and looked as new as on the day they were bought. Those who re sided here didn’t play anymore.
    I walked by a gray-headed Persian who was standing in one of these cute doll’s beds and was keeping the ceiling in view.
    »What attracts your attention like that, brother?« I said, likewise fascinated by his strong grimacing that ranged betwe en fear and great expectations.
    »They’re coming closer«, he replied.
    »Who?«
    »Well, the mice.«
    I raised my head and inspected the ceiling for anything mice-like. Without any result.
    »But I don’t see any mice up there.«
    »They aren’t normal mice.« His white whiskers vibrated in tension like they were carrying power current, yeah, his whole matted head shivered so much in fever as i f he was to explode any second.
    »They come from Planet Nagor-X and can stay invisible – and penetrate solid matter.«
    »Got it«, I said, nodded compassionately and intended to leave himself completely to his st udies of extraterrestrial mice.
    »Don’t listen to the nutcase!«
    I turned around and faced an attractive Egyptian Mau. Her green eyes seemed to reflect the seaweed fields of all oceans. Her dark patterned tail, which grew out of a sand-colored, cheetah spotted body, brushed my face.
    »They should have showed this guy the rope a long time ago«, she said, approached me very closely and acted most conspiratorially. »There’s no Plant Nagor-X. Actually they come Planet Harfohr-X. And they aren’t mice but cockroaches. Plus they can’t penetrate solid matter like this douche bag keeps insisting, no, they shoot laser beams from their eyes!«
    So much for the state of mind of the »guests« at this establishment.
    »I already thought as much myself, honey«, I comforted her. »But it could be worse. Imagine you’d have to pay taxes!« I moved on.
    A red colored fellow, who crossed my path and seemed somehow awake, was actually just giving his lifetime confessions.
    »... and then Mommy said, don’t go too far from my teats, Otti, oh yeah, I remember very well that she said that, because in the backyard there are dogs, she said, you know what dogs are? My son, they are very big animals who make very big poop but in opposite to us don’t bury it so that humans will step in it which dogs find very fun ny, me too actually, Mommy said ... «
    Gustav could as well have brought me to a nuthouse which by the way would have been much cheaper for him anyway, if I was interpreting his angry bargaining with the Night Witch correctly. A total waste of time and energy. Because I would have rather poisoned myself with the consumption of dog poop than to endure just a single hour with these morons. Therefore I instantly ent ered the next level of my plan.
    Like I already mentioned, Gustav was very busy with persuading the old witch to give him a price deduction before the plane took off with him inside. Both didn’t pay any attention to me because naturally they assumed that there was no escape from this clink. But there was, and what a simple one!
    Sweating and blushing from all the disputing stress, Gustav had put down the backpack next to his feet. The essential time slot seemed to have opened for me. During a couple of gasps I felt far away from the view of the two discomposed negotiators as well of the nuthouse inhabitants. The latter preferred to watch the various threats from outer space anyway. I sneaked to the welcome counter very slowly, and when finally I reached the striking distance of my can opener’s elephant feet, I was out of danger that anyone might notice my secret mission. So I crawled inside the open backpa ck and made myself comfortable.
    After a while I heard through the fabric that apparently they agreed on a price and now