Safeword: Matte - In Training Read Free Page B

she’d screwed up.
    “For someone who wants their safeword taken
away, you sure pull it out an awful lot. I wasn’t touching you. You
really thought I’d try to force that into you?”
    Sam dropped her hands and
looked at the floor. “We’ve talked about the not speaking thing
before, Ethan. It’s hard. If the only thing you allow me to say is
a safeword, it comes out. If I hadn’t been under speech restriction
I’d have just said, You’re not using that
on me .” She paused as she saw his jaw
clench. Apparently, that hadn’t helped. “I don’t know what to say.
I’m sorry. I do trust you, but...damn, this is hard. Please put the
food away and tell me we can get back on track.”
    He stayed where he was, muscles clenched,
without saying anything. Sam sighed, again. “I’m sorry I hurt you.
I do trust you, and if I’d stopped to think about it I would’ve
known you wouldn’t hurt me as bad as that giant plug would if it
was pushed all the way in. I promise I’ll slow down and think more
in the future, and will give you more of a chance before I say my
safeword.”
    Some of his muscles unclenched, and Sam felt
a tightness in her own gut relax. She walked to him and put her
arms around him, though he was still facing the island. He waited
several long seconds before turning and embracing her back. “I love
you, but I need your trust.”
    “I’m sorry.” She hoped her eyes conveyed her
feelings as she added, “I’m sorry I hurt you, and I’m sorry I
didn’t give you a chance to show me your intentions. I’ll try to do
better. What can I do to help us move past this?”
    When he didn’t answer she burrowed her head
into his chest and said, “Will you punish me, Sir? So we can clean
the slate?”
    Ethan’s large hands stroked her back a few
times and he said, “No. I won’t punish you for safewording. I have
chicken noodle soup made with mung bean noodles, and I think you’ll
be fine eating some now. You can have more later if you want, but
since we’ve stopped, we may as well eat.”
    Sam appreciated Ethan considering her
low-carb diet when he fed her, but mung bean noodles? She
understood the soup was designed to be easy on her digestive system
as he worked her ass over this weekend, and had expected to be fed
a lot of protein shakes and soup. She tried to look pleasant as she
said, “What can I do to help, Sir?”
    “Get us both some water and spoons and have
a seat, please.”
    Doing more than he asked was a risk, but Sam
took the initiative to put placemats and napkins out as well as
drinks and silverware. She noted his bowl was huge and hers tiny.
Ethan read her thoughts and said, “Yours is just under three
hundred calories and is primarily protein and fat. It should hold
you, but if you’re hungry when we’re through you can have another
bowl, or a protein shake, your choice.”
    “You’re taking charge of what I can eat
beyond scenes? Sir?”
    “Only as it pertains to keeping you prepared
for anal training. We’ll discuss the parameters in detail tomorrow
morning, and you’ll have an opportunity to negotiate before
agreeing to what I want to see happen over the next four months. I
want to give you a taste of it tonight though, before the
negotiations. Can you give me some leeway, even for the stuff you
don’t feel you’ve given consent?”
    Sam took a breath and thought about it.
She’d known anal training would be tricky — timing meals and enemas
so she was clean during their sessions, without going overboard on
the enemas. She nodded to herself before looking up to meet his
gaze. “Yes, Sir. If you can be patient with my questions?”
    He raised his eyebrows, considering, and
said, “I don’t mean to come across as impatient, these are all fair
questions. I’ll try to do better.” He smiled, but it didn’t go to
his eyes. “It seems I’d thought once you agreed to marry me, you’d
miraculously give me more trust, and not feel the need to question
my every