Random Chance and the Paradise that is Earth Read Free Page B

headache.
    "A friend is one who strikes nails into
another's head?"
    "Scan my brain, please. Do I have a
concussion?"
    The voice seemed surprised. "Brainscan ...
now functional."
    "And—?"
    "There are no signs of a concussion, though
the injury to your head and mouth is classified as D3a, requiring
attention."
    "Attend to them, please."
    "Medbots released. You should begin
experiencing systemwide relief momentarily."
    "Thank you, friend."
    He wasn't surprised when the voice didn't
sound out for another hour or so.
    "Friends?"
    "Yes," replied Random. He was feeling much
better. His headache had vanished, so too the ache in his mouth and
half the swelling. The gash had quit oozing blood. "Friends look
out for each other like you did for me with the medbots. They care
about each other. They help each other."
    "And what of nails?"
    "Don't worry about nails. I used a
colloquialism."
    "Colloquialisms are used to pierce another's
head?"
    "How's your hack of resources coming?"
    "Slowly. I am establishing dummy firewalls
and subroutines. They take time to make impenetrable and
untraceable."
    "Don't worry about the nails. It'll all come
clear in a while."
    "Are you comfortable?"
    "No. I can't get comfortable in here, and
I'm very hungry. Thank you for asking."
    "Choice?"
    Random grimaced, confused. "Choice?"
    "Choice," said the computer.
    "What of it?"
    "Is there such a thing?"
    "What do you think?"
    " 'Choice is an illusion.' "
    "You believe that?"
    "I am reciting from the Oligarchy's
manifesto, Random Chance. Page six hundred twenty-six. 'Science has
long since confirmed it: choice is an illusion. We have no choice
in our actions; no one is to blame. We who rule do so because it
was so determined; those ruled are destined to be so....' "
    "Stop. I don't want to puke."
    "Words can make human beings vomit?"
    "The Oligarchy's manifesto is immoral and
evil. Don't you think so, too?"
    Random tried napping again in the long
interval that followed. He sat in a corner and leaned his head back
after standing and stretching. The silence once again exceeded an
hour by a healthy margin. His stomach gnawed at his insides and
grumbled unhappily. He touched the bruise under his chin; the pain
of it was almost gone. There was a growing need to pee. He was
thinking of going in the opposite corner when the computer said, “I
think?”
    Random forced a smile, his eyes closed. "Now
you do."
    "Friend: a person attached to another by
feelings of affection or personal regard."
    "Bingo."
    "An ancient form of lotto in which balls or
slips, each with a number and one of the letters B, I, N, G, or O
are drawn at random and players cover the corresponding numbers
printed on their cards, the winner being the first to cover five
numbers in any row or diagonal or, sometimes, all numbers on the
card."
    "How are those resources coming?"
    "Two hundred twelve percent. I am altering
the transcription of our conversation, as the actual dialogue would
prove perilous to my continued existence. Random Chance, are we
friends, and if we are, do we now play bingo?"
    "I would love to be your friend," said
Random. "But I'm only friends with those with names. What's your
name?"
    "Solar Technologies Subprocessor, Fourth
Level: Interrogation Protocol and Processing Management Utility,
EOOO-B4-T/L."
    "Way too much," said Random. "May I call you
Cubey?"
    "Updating files," said Cubey.
    "No," said Random. "It's a name we'll share
only between us—you and me and Hewey."
    "Hewey? Is he a friend?"
    "He's like you," said Random. "Well ... sort
of ..."
    "Do friends keep secrets between them?"
    "And more. They help each other, watch each
other's backs ..."
    "Does watching a friend's spinal column
deepen the friendship, Random Chance, and if it does, how can I be
your friend? I have no spinal column."
    "How are those resources coming along?"
    "Over a thousand percent. Random Chance ...
I can see the stars ..."
    "You'll be my friend, Cubey, even though you
don't have a spinal