never better about her body and image. Her self-esteem had plummeted so low that it would take years of healing to repair. Outwardly, she seemed confident and tough. It took a long time to create that disguise, and she found it worked well and people left her alone. But even her few friends didn’t know how poorly she thought of herself.
Aaron and all the other guilty ones would never know what they had done to her. After years of severe depression and thousands spent on therapy, she had come to realize she didn’t trust men. They had always been the source of her ridicule, shame, and self-loathing. She had learned to associate them with harm and distrust.
*
By this point in her job, she had managed to remember some of the servers’ names. There was Marco, a small Italian guy who had large brown eyes and spiky black hair. He dyed the spiked tips orange and red to look like his hair was on fire. Bursting with restless energy and always giving Charlie compliments, Marco had character and didn’t care what people thought of him.
Then there were a handful of servers she considered the “elite.” The untouchables. Charlie was better off not knowing much more. It was a crowd that never really accepted her, or anyone else not exactly like themselves.
Jesse wasn’t like the others that worked in Delivery. Most of the guys were younger, late teens and early twenties. Jesse seemed to be a bit older and didn’t have many friends at work. He made small conversation with his coworkers, but she never saw him sharing a beer after work with anyone besides his buddy Jake. Even that was rare. He was a growing mystery for Charlie that was begging to be solved.
Paulina and Angie were sisters and definitely the most hospitable and friendly to customers and new employees. Charlie grew up across the street from Paulina and Angie, and they had spent some time together in the summers having sleepovers and playing video games. But Charlie’s fear of being publicly ridiculed kept her indoors and away from joining activities like her friends did. And that became a cycle. The sisters became her idealized version of life. Everything seemed so much easier for them – they were smoother, happier, and were able to discard nasty words and not let things ruin their day like Charlie would. As they grew older, they didn’t have much in common to talk about, so eventually they didn’t interact much at all. Charlie stayed home with more solitary pursuits: fine arts, movies, and crosswords.
*
Work was much busier on her next scheduled shift. The kitchen was a disaster and the dishwasher had called in sick. One of the prep cooks had quit -- eliminating four menu items for the afternoon -- and the manager, Karalee, arrived late, leaving Charlie to do much more work than nine dollars an hour was worth. But it kept her on her toes and made her day fly.
“Thank you so much. You saved us today,” Karalee said, practically bowing to Charlie once the lunch rush was over.
“No problem! I like keeping busy,” Charlie said, wiping the beads of sweat from her brow.
“Hey Angie, you can go home now,” s aid Karalee, walking past and throwing her arm up to give Angie a high five.
“Thanks girl!” Angie said on her way to the front. “Ugh, finally! I wish all our hostesses worked like you do,” Angie said to Charlie while rolling her eyes.
“Well, it might have something to do with the fact that you guys only hire fifteen-year-olds.” Charlie laughed.
“Yeah. Lawrence is an ass. He only hires the ones that pique his… curiosity during the interview, if you know what I mean.”
“I’ve noticed. I feel like I’m babysitting toddler beauty queens on Friday and Saturday nights,” Charlie said.
“That’s nothing! Have you seen Delivery? I don’t know what’s worse, babysitting infant hostesses or babysitting canned-whipped-cream-huffing delivery drivers. We went through four cases of whipped cream last month! I saw how much we made in
Kevin J. Anderson, Rebecca Moesta, June Scobee Rodgers
David Sherman & Dan Cragg
From the Notebooks of Dr Brain (v4.0) (html)