Portia's Exclusive and Confidential Rules on True Friendship Read Free Page B

mission?”
    â€œI didn’t.”
    Vera then directs me to the part of the store reservedstrictly for music. Faded sheet music balances on shelves, crooked concert posters line the wall, and prehistoric audiocassettes fill the secondhand wood-paneled bookcases. Vera invites me to help her sort through a new shipment of vinyl records.
    NOTE: A vinyl record is a plastic round saucer the size of an average steering wheel that has music programmed onto it. As it spins around on this contraption called a turntable, the music plays with this never-ending scratching sound on every tune. I can’t believe people actually listened to songs this way and liked it! I totally feel sorry for them.
    Vera selects one of the vinyl records. On the cover is a photo of a woman with big hair named Patsy Cline. The title of the album is Sentimentally Yours, and the word “Heartaches” also appears on the cover. Vera carefully slips it out and places it on the turntable. The music plays at full volume. Vera smiles a rare smile, then does a shuffle as she reaches for her trusty measuring tape. It’s almost as if she’s dancing. She looks at me with squinty eyes. “What happened to your necklace?”
    I look down at the necklace I’m wearing today, a gift from Vera. The gold-plated shooting star hanging from a simple chain is now completely unrecognizable. “Ralphie did it! I swear I’m going to squish him the next time our paths cross!”
    Vera looks at me with a sparkle in her eyes. “That’s a pretty darn bold move, missy!”
    â€œYou don’t understand. Ralphie has eight legs. Seven should serve him just fine!”
    Vera crinkles her nose like she’s got an itch.
    I then recount the strange adventure of Misty and her deceptive retainer case. I describe Misty’s cave-girl message to me about “being the one” and her out-of-the-blue-sky request for me to take on a new case featuring her alleged “friend in need.” The more I tell Vera this unusual tale, the more she insists, “This Misty chickie sounds like a live one! Taking on this new case will only help sharpen your detective skills. As I see it, it’s a no-lose situation, Ms. Avatar.”
    I look straight into Vera’s eyes. I can’t argue with her crystal-clear wisdom. I take a deep breath and then exhale. “Okay, I’ll do it. But I think you should know thatI’m an incredibly busy person with miles of homework and a pop quiz on the way. I’m not sure there are enough hours, minutes, seconds, or even nanoseconds in the day or night to take on another case!”
    Vera says with the cosmic patience of an old lioness, “You’ll find a way.”
    She then disappears into the back office while I sort through recycled prom dresses to the scratchy country melody playing in the background. I decide to arrange the dresses by color instead of size, just to keep things entertaining. Almost an hour passes, and then the sound of a rooster’s crow from my PDA signals that it’s time to head off to Contentment. I lift the mechanical arm from the record player just at the point when Ms. Cline is singing about how she’s longing for a lost love who had blue eyes. I turn off the record player and shout good-bye in the direction of Vera’s office.
    Vera responds, “So long, Portia. You know that you’re on your way to a new discovery!”
    I’m still not sure if taking on Misty’s new mysterious case is the best timing. With some hesitation, I answer, “I hope so!”
    Before I leave, Vera adds, “I’ll see you next time. A new shipment of lamp shades is coming in on Wednesday. I’ll need some help sorting them.”
    â€œI’m there!” And just like that, with my knapsack back on over my shoulders and a pomegranate in one hand, I’m out the door.
    Under the Palmville sky, a handful of wild parrots flock from one