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back. Already he sounded much calmer. In Phil s experience, that could sometimes be a bad sign. The natural human reaction would have been to freak out a little more, try to deny that anything he d seen so far was real. The ones who took it too much in stride at first tended to be the ones who cracked the widest.
Okay, fine, Lucas said. All this shit is really for real. What I don t get is how? How is any of this possible?
Phil shrugged. I don t know. Someone- a clown demon, actually- once tried to tell me that the Hill is built on an ancient Native American burial ground. Somebody else insisted that this is the place where the final battle between good and evil is supposed to take place, which is why me and Caleb have to keep stopping apocalypses.
Whoa, wait. Apocalypses as in the Apocalypse?
No, apocalypses with a small a , not a capital A. They re actually more common than you think. But I don t really buy any of those reasons. Personally, I just think that all the beasties just need a place where they can be themselves, go hang out in bars, score some drugs, buy some Slim Jims.
Monsters eat Slim Jims?
Phil thought for a moment about the night he met his girlfriend, and then smiled. Oh yeah. They re really not that much different than us. He heard footsteps behind him and turned to see Lucas come out of the back room. Are you sure I can t just go home, just quickly? These things are really disgusting.
You ll stay your entire shift, Phil said. And if you decide to quit after tonight you need to let us know before you leave tonight so the manager can hire someone else right away. You planning on staying?
I don t know. You have to admit this is lot to deal with. I bet a lot of people quit after their first night, huh?
Not as many as you think. I guess it s kind of like Lawrence Fishburne said in The Matrix. Once people find the rabbit hole, they want to see how deep it really goes.
Through the front door Phil could see someone approaching the store. Tonight s apocalypse had been averted, so everyone would figure now that it was safe to go out and get their snacks and smokes. Lucas saw the customer coming and raised an eyebrow at Phil. Aren t you going to lock the doors or something?
Why the fuck would I do that?
Well, we just stopped a a thing. You can t really consider keeping the store open after that, can you?
Of course you can. The world doesn t stop turning just because it almost ended. Now you should get to work on putting out those magazines I started to show you earlier.
What about Caleb? Shouldn t he be in here doing something, too?
Never you mind him. He ll be in after he s done talking to Gloria.
What s the deal with those two, anyway?
I doubt that even they know.
Chapter 3
    Both Caleb and Gloria were quiet for several seconds after Phil and Lucas went back in. Caleb didn t know where this awkwardness always came from on the few occasions that Gloria came around. They certainly hadn t been awkward when they d worked together. They hadn t been co-workers for very long, certainly nowhere near as long as Caleb had been working with Phil, but they hadn t been shy when trading snarky comments. On the last night they had worked together, however, Caleb had hinted that he liked her, although maybe not in the most appropriate manner. She d quit soon after and had gone back to her day job as a stripper, yet she still moonlighted as a monster hunter on the Hill. She wasn t even the only beastie hunter/stripper, although as far a Caleb was concerned she was the only one who made a difference.
    So what s new, Butcher? she finally said. You know I hate it when people call me that. No you don t. I know you well enough. You
    get off on it. Don t complain. At least the beasties know you by a cool code name. How many other convenience store clerks out there actually have a code name?
    Caleb cocked a thumb in the direction of the store. At least two. They re starting to call Phil the Necrophile and I m sure that with a little help I