Mummy Madness Read Free Page B

titchology is that it’s too small to see. Almost too titchy to
     imagine. So the gadgets sometimes, you know …’ he continued, turning one
     of his jacket pockets inside out.
    ‘Disappear?’ suggested Sophie.
    ‘Quite,’ agreed the
     scientist. ‘Benjamin, is your mobile switched on?’
    ‘Yes, Professor,’ said Ben,
     tapping his trouser pocket.
    ‘Then let’s try my
     device.’ The children and dogs watched as the professor made his hand into the
     shape of a phone. ‘Thumb up,’ he explained, ‘and little finger
     raised, like so.’ He put his hand to his ear. ‘It’s like they do
     on TV talent contests when they want you to vote for them,’ he explained.
     ‘Not that I watch such rubbish. But I know that all those really annoying
     contestants make a hand signal like a phone. “
Vote for meee. Vote for
     meee!
” Except, you see, I have small implants under my skin so my
     hand
is
a phone.’
    The professor waggled his thumb.
     ‘Just getting a signal,’ he explained. ‘Zero seven six one
     one,’ he began, talking to his little finger. ‘Eight eight zero three
     five one.’
    ‘That’s my number,’
     said Ben, his eyes widening. Everyone jumped as Ben’s ringtone rang out. He
     fumbled in his pocket and looked around at everyone.
    ‘Well, go on then,’ urged
     Sophie. ‘Answer it. It might be Mum or someone.’
    The professor
     chuckled as Ben slid open his phone and put it to his ear. ‘Hello?’ he
     began.
    ‘Hello indeed,’ said the
     professor into his little finger. ‘Are you receiving, Benjamin? This is the
     professor calling from his revolutionary hand-held mobile device.’
     

     
    Ben looked up.
     ‘It’s you!’ he said, pointing at the professor. ‘Talking
     from your … 
hand phone
?’
    ‘It most certainly is,’
     beamed the professor, turning and walking into the next room. ‘So what do you
     think of my new invention?’
    ‘It’s kind
     of … weird,’ stuttered Ben into his phone. ‘And really cool, I
     suppose.’
    ‘I agree,’ came the
     professor’s reply. ‘One of my best-ever inventions. I mean, how many
     times have you lost your phone or had it stolen? You can’t lose this one
     because it’s implanted under the skin of your fingers.’
    ‘Does it hurt?’ asked Ben,
     talking into his mobile. ‘I mean the implanting bit.’
    ‘Not one jot,’ assured the
     scientist. ‘“Titch-ology”. Teeny-weeny. Unimaginably small. The
     question is, young man, would you want to buy one?’
    ‘Of course,’ stuttered Ben.
     ‘It’s the best invention ever.’
    ‘Agreed again,’ said the
     professor. ‘As a famous astronaut sort of said, it’s a small invention
     by me that will result in a huge leap for humankind. Or something like that. Anyway,
     over and out.’ Professor Cortex shook his hand and the signal was lost. He
     bounded back into
the laboratory and stood
     hopping from foot to foot in what Sophie called the Mad Professor Dance.
    The children’s mouths were open.
     Ollie was jumping up and down with excitement. Spud was bounding round the room.
     ‘That’s the best thing ever, Prof,’ he barked. ‘Can you do
     one for dogs? I could have a hotline to the biscuit factory.’
    Lara gave Spud a disapproving look.
    ‘Humans only at this stage,’
     noted the professor. ‘But maybe,’ he said, thinking aloud, ‘just
     maybe the technology could be built into Spy Dog collars. And,’ he announced,
     beaming at Lara, ‘it’s inventions like this that allow me to make huge
     amounts of money that can be ploughed back into my Spy Dog training programme. What
     do you say, GM451?’
    Lara couldn’t keep her tail still.
     Her bullet-holed ear stood proudly to attention.
It’s a winner, Prof
,
     she wagged.
And, if you need a volunteer to try it out, semi-retired agent GM451
     is at your service.
HURTMORE PRISON
    Mr Big went straight to the front of
     the dinner queue. Nobody dared complain. He was still
relatively new