McNally's Bluff Read Free Page B

her appear both naked and modest. There was a demure smile on her lips and only her famous red hair broke from a detailed imitation of the original Venus. Forgive the analogy, but she stood as still as a statue with only her shiny black eyes reflecting a glimmer of life behind the facade. It was amazin’.
    The spotlight faded as the house lights came on. The audience, shaking their heads and exclaiming over the presentation, hardly had a chance to digest what they had seen before Hayes was beckoning to them to come forth and pick a partner for the search for the goal. “Marlena will join us as soon as she screws her arms back on.” He worked the crowd he now held firmly in the palm of his hand with all the finesse of a true carny pitch man.
    In the “His” and “Hers” queues I noticed Mr. and Mrs. Vance Tremaine. His family money was so old it died, forcing Vance to marry Penny Brightworth, whose money was so new it squeaked. Mr. Brightworth was a fast-food czar who catered lavishly to his only daughter, whom he called Bright Penny. Vance’s smart pals called the match dollar wise and penny foolish. Vance had an eye for young ladies and it was said he had cheated on Penny on their honeymoon. The more callous said he actually did it at his own wedding reception when he went missing from the bridal table for fifteen minutes before being spotted coming out of a utility closet with one of the waitresses.
    This has long bothered poor Penny. She once asked her friend and mentor, the formidable dowager Emily Fairhurst, “Can a man do it in fifteen minutes?” To which Emily responded, “My dear, he’s your husband, you tell me.”
    A group of Vance’s prep school buddies once pasted a bumper sticker to the rear of his Rolls that advised KEEP IT IN YOUR PANTS, VANCE.
    Also on line, much to Penny’s annoyance and Vance’s delight, was the beautiful and nubile Elizabeth “Fitz” Fitzwilliams. Vance had been after the young Fitz for years, to no avail, and Penny had gone to great lengths to keep the two as far apart as aeons in history. When the fates brought them together Penny kept a vigilant eye on both and, should nature call, Penny had been known to cajole Fitz into accompanying her to the loo, refusing to leave them alone for even five minutes, fearing Vance might attempt to break his record.
    If Fitz picked Bonnie and Vance picked Clyde, Penny would pick the knife thrower. Come to think of it, what would happen if Carolyn picked Bonnie and Laddy Taylor picked Clyde?
    With Fitz was Joe Gallo, a young man who used to be tight with my Georgia. Once a caddie at one of our more prestigious clubs, Joe, who aspired to join me fourth estate as a reporter, had got himself a position as news gatherer for our local television station, which is how he must have made Lolly’s list of notables. How Joe got Fitz I wouldn’t know.
    Also among us were a couple who appear on the channel Gallo labors for with their own morning show, unoriginally titled Breakfast with Mack and Marge. It’s a television version of the old radio shows that featured celebrated couples who were supposed to be at their breakfast table chatting about their wonderful evenings nightclubbing after the theater or rubbing shoulders at a society ball. These revelations greatly delighted their audience comprised primarily of the secretaries, wives, waitresses and telephone operators who would never see the inside of a nightclub, theater or ballroom.
    Mack and Marge work on a set at the studio in West Palm that features a divan for the couple and a few easy chairs for guests. A coffee table holds an urn, cups and saucers so Marge can play mother. After commenting on the weather and making a few public announcements they introduce their esteemed guest. Authors, gardeners, decorators, antiquers and politicians lead the list. My mother, who is a serious gardener, boasting six million varieties of begonias under her care, has been earmarked for an appearance but to