Master/slave Relations: Handbook of Theory and Practice Read Free Page B

tendency in the Leather community for a slave to petition
a Master to be that Master's slave. In some cases, there is a
tendency among Leather Masters to see it as their duty/obligation to accept such petitions and to "Master" the person - if the
Master deems that person ready to be Mastered.
    Again, while there are undoubtedly exceptions in the Not-Leather
community, it's been my experience that Doms tend to be looking for submissives for play, and that over time, the D/s relationships sometimes drift into M/s relationships - often with little or
no formality.
    I'm not proposing that one approach is better than another. I'm
only pointing out that there are two quite different starting points:
a person petitioning to be a particular Master's slave versus a
person seeking a submissive or slave.
    Describing Some Relationships: husband/wife;
Top/bottom; Dom/submissive; Master/slave; Owner/
slave
    I'm about to wander into the realm of generalities. At least I let
you know.
    husband/wife: Generally, both partners have equal power and
responsibilities; structured power exchange (or authority exchage)
is not generally included in marital vows. In fact, it is unlikely that
the average couple-on-the-street would have the faintest idea what you were talking about if you asked them about the role of
power exchange in their marriage. In my personal opinion, this
is one reason that marriage is so difficult. (I've been in two: each
lasted about 17 years. I'm 61 as I'm writing this.)

    Top/bottom: In BDSM play, this describes who is doing what
to whom and does not necessarily involve power exchange. It's
just a description of the physical action. Usually the Top is the
person performing the action, and the bottom is receiving the
action. You can be a Top and be flogging someone, or you can
be a bottom and enjoy a flogging. You can lead the action from
the Top position - you can determine which flogger you use and
how hard you flog your bottom - or you can lead the action from
the bottom, telling your play partner (acting as the Top) to strike
a little harder/softer or a little more to the right or left and to pay
attention to the wrapping, please!!! Master Skip Chasey refers
to Top/bottom play as "about the physical body." Master Steve
Sampson thinks of it as "about the sexual self."
    Dominant/submissive: For our purposes, this is the first level
of relationship that involves power exchange. Consensus has it
that D/s play is situational or time-limited. Often, D/s play negotiations involve discussions of likes, dislikes, and limits. There
is one senior Dom in my community who won't play with a new
play partner, even for a scene, unless the partner sits down for a
formal scene negotiation leading to a scene-specific contract. In
a general sense, D/s is about micromanagement. The submissive is not to do anything that the Dom/me doesn't direct. Master
Skip refers to D/s play as "about the mental body." Master Steve
looks at this play as about energy. Despite the conventional wisdom that D/s play is time-limited, I can easily imagine long-lasting
relationships that have grown to incorporate negotiated D/s into
a marriage or marriage-like relationship.
    Master/slave: The M/s dynamic is generally considered the
most extreme form of relationship. In this relationship, the slave has given Master complete authority over him/herself. Now: a
caveat. Leather M/s relationships generally begin with a contract that includes paragraphs describing the scope and limits of
the M/s dynamic. By that very act, the M/s dynamic is viewed
by some as something less than a total commitment to the concept of M/s. This has given rise to a new relationship category
- Owner/slave - discussed in the next section. Above, I've mentioned that D/s often involves micromanagement. In M/s, the
object is that the slave gets to the point that micromanagement
gives way to macro management. As the slave learns Master's
habits, the slave