Louise Rennison_Georgia Nicolson 04 Read Free Page A

smoke,” and he said, “No chance of a shag, then, I suppose?” And he and his mates went off slapping and shoving each other.
    I said to Jas, “They show a distinct lack of maturiosity, but never fear, that is where I come in.I have thought of something très très amusant to do with glove animal if it snows this winter.”
    Jas didn’t say anything.
    â€œJas.”
    â€œWhat?”
    â€œI said something très amusant and you ignorez-vous ed me. You do remember good old glove animal, don’t you?”
    â€œI know I got three bad conduct marks because you made me wear my gloves pinned over my ears like a big doggy with a beret on top.”
    â€œ Voilà , glove animal. Anyway, I think he should make a comeback this term and liven up the stiffs.”
    She was pretending not to listen to me, but I knew she wanted to really. She was doing fringe fiddling. However, I resisted the temptation to slap her hand, and said, slowly so that she could understand me, “Glove animals have to wear sunglasses when it snows.”
    â€œWhat?”
    â€œIs that all you can say?”
    â€œWhat?”
    â€œYou are doing it to annoy me, mon petit pal, but I Iove you.”
    â€œDon’t start.”
    â€œAnyway, we will have to wear sunglasses with glove animal if it snows, to prevent…snow blindness!!”
    She didn’t get it, though. I have to keep the comedy levels up at school all by myself.
    assembly
9:20 a.m.
    I told the rest of the ace gang about the glove animal and snow blindness hilariosity and they gave me the special Klingon salute. Then I got the ferret-eye from Hawkeye and had to pretend to listen to our large and glorious leader, Slim. Her feet are so fat that you can’t actually see any shoe at all. It is only a question of time before she explodes.
    Slim was rambling on about the splendor of Shakespeare’s Hamlet as an allegory for modern times.
    For once she is right. Shakespeare is not just some really old boring bloke in tights, because after all it was he who said, “To snog or not to snog, that is the question.”
    How true, Bill.
    break
    Our new pastime to fill in the long hours before we are allowed to go home is called “Let’s go down the disco.” Anytime any one of the ace gang says it, we all have to do manic disco dancing from the seventies (excess head shaking and arm waggling). Even if I do say it myself, it is a piece of resistance.
    german
    We disco danced at our desks pretty much all the way through German whilst Herr Kamyer wrote ludicrous things on the board about Herr Koch. I said to him when we were leaving class, “ Vas is der point?”
    lunchtime
    Very nippy noodles shivering around outside.
    I said to the gang, “What harm have we ever done to anyone that we are made to go outside in Antarctic conditions?”
    Rosie, Ellen, Jools and Mabs all said, “None, we have never done anything.”
    But Jas, who seems to have turned into the Wise Woman of the Forest, said, “Well, there wasthe locust thing, and the dropping of the blodge lab skeleton onto Mr. Attwood’s head and…”
    Honestly, if I wasn’t the girlfriend of a Sex God I would have had to duff Jas up, she is so ludicrously “thoughtful” these days. I think I liked her better when she was all depressed and didn’t have a boyfriend. Regular snogging has brought out the worst in her.
    The Bummers came by all tarted up. Jackie wears even more makeup than those scary circus people. You know, when you go to the circus and you accidentally see a trapeze artist close-up and they are orange.
    Alison Bummer, unusually spot free, with just the one gigantic boil on her neck, shouted over to us as they headed for the back fields and town. “Bye-bye, little girls, have a nice time doing your lessons.”
    I said, “Honestly, I don’t know how they get away with it. They turn up for register, hang around