hater."
"I hate you," I say, and I smile at the end of it, and he smiles too. "That's supposed to upset you."
He makes a little gasp and clutches his heart. "How's that?"
"Stupid," I say.
He shakes his head. "You remind me of Juney."
"Ha-ha." I'm a little stung he should bring up my 'sibling' like this.
"Hey…the natural arch is too far away."
"So…what are we doing?" My heart picks up. He's gotten me off on our own on porpoise? Yes, I meant to say porpoise.
I'm giddy!
"Well…he ah…he needs your support."
I stop. "Who…what?"
"Your dad. He needs you to support the retirement idea. It's…hard." He's looking at me, he's talking to me like I am Juney.
"I get it," I say, also like Juney. "No…you know what? I know I've been away with school…and…life? I get that, Marcus. But he's still my," I emphasize 'my' by spreading my hand over the center of my chest, "dad. And you," I point at him, "don't get to tell me how to speak to him. Alright?" I fold my arms and throw my weight on one leg and stare.
He is rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry."
"I'm a little tired of that too. Sorry doesn't…take it away." That's twice he did the sorry routine on me, twice in one day.
"Take what away?" His hands go to his hips.
"Your arrogance." I'm out of control—I've done air quotes.
"My what?"
"Hubris. Pride. Assholery."
"Wha…?"
"Jessica? For real? Isn't she like…a hundred?"
"Okay, okay. Be nice."
"Why? Why should I? I'm nine."
"You said it…."
"Oh," I bat my hands at him and walk away. I give him the bird, but I don't look back.
I don't know what just happened, but I told you we'd dropped another level. I told you we were in a new place.
He catches up, hand on my arm. "Bedilia…slow down. Give me a chance to explain."
Artie is busy cooking, but he's looking our way. He's curious.
Explain what? That I need counseling?
"It's about Juney isn't it. You don't have to worry. He's getting to really…he's a, it's getting better between them."
Oh, I can see the whole deal in his eyes. There's a conflict between Jessica and Juney. I love that little cretan.
"Doesn't she have a couple of…?"
"No. She doesn't have children."
"But I thought you didn't want to do that to Juney. You said you weren't going to date until he was older." I kind of mean this and I kind of don't. Yeah, I'm a liar, too, a big one. I'm pretending it's always been about Juney.
"He is older Bedilia. You just said it, he's nine. And he's never had to share me before, and he's fighting it. But Jessica's been patient. She's been…."
"I don't want to hear how Jessica's been," I say, a little too much intensity on the 'J.'
"Hey…no one replaces you."
What does that mean?
"I told you, he can't wait to see you."
Oh…that's what it means.
"And I can't wait to see him," I say sweetly. And we stare at one another just a beat too long.
Artie calls us to dinner.
Chapter 11
He's not that glad to see me. After the awkward ride home in Artie's truck, me sitting between Artie and Marcus, one half of me asexual, the Artie side, what do you think, and the other side on freaking fire, well after that it was another attempt to clean up and meet downstairs for Juney's homecoming from his grandmother's house and feign normal.
Half an hour later I open the door and wave to Elaine as she drives off. Juney's a cute kid, looks just like Marcus must have, super cute. I have to admit I'm really glad to see him. "Hello Junior," I say, playing up the name he hates.
"Hello Bedilia Susannah," he says, like touché.
He squeezes under my arm with his backpack and walks right past me. "Where's Dad?" he says.
"Out back with Artie. Hey, don't I get a hug?"
"No," he says, taller than last time, when I left for Chicago, and he wouldn't come and give me a hug then either.
And he goes out the back door, and I hear Dad say, "Hey there he is," like it's Justin Bieber and Dad's a middle school girl.
So it's high-fives between him and the Beebs. I have my
"I hate you," I say, and I smile at the end of it, and he smiles too. "That's supposed to upset you."
He makes a little gasp and clutches his heart. "How's that?"
"Stupid," I say.
He shakes his head. "You remind me of Juney."
"Ha-ha." I'm a little stung he should bring up my 'sibling' like this.
"Hey…the natural arch is too far away."
"So…what are we doing?" My heart picks up. He's gotten me off on our own on porpoise? Yes, I meant to say porpoise.
I'm giddy!
"Well…he ah…he needs your support."
I stop. "Who…what?"
"Your dad. He needs you to support the retirement idea. It's…hard." He's looking at me, he's talking to me like I am Juney.
"I get it," I say, also like Juney. "No…you know what? I know I've been away with school…and…life? I get that, Marcus. But he's still my," I emphasize 'my' by spreading my hand over the center of my chest, "dad. And you," I point at him, "don't get to tell me how to speak to him. Alright?" I fold my arms and throw my weight on one leg and stare.
He is rubbing the back of his neck. "Sorry."
"I'm a little tired of that too. Sorry doesn't…take it away." That's twice he did the sorry routine on me, twice in one day.
"Take what away?" His hands go to his hips.
"Your arrogance." I'm out of control—I've done air quotes.
"My what?"
"Hubris. Pride. Assholery."
"Wha…?"
"Jessica? For real? Isn't she like…a hundred?"
"Okay, okay. Be nice."
"Why? Why should I? I'm nine."
"You said it…."
"Oh," I bat my hands at him and walk away. I give him the bird, but I don't look back.
I don't know what just happened, but I told you we'd dropped another level. I told you we were in a new place.
He catches up, hand on my arm. "Bedilia…slow down. Give me a chance to explain."
Artie is busy cooking, but he's looking our way. He's curious.
Explain what? That I need counseling?
"It's about Juney isn't it. You don't have to worry. He's getting to really…he's a, it's getting better between them."
Oh, I can see the whole deal in his eyes. There's a conflict between Jessica and Juney. I love that little cretan.
"Doesn't she have a couple of…?"
"No. She doesn't have children."
"But I thought you didn't want to do that to Juney. You said you weren't going to date until he was older." I kind of mean this and I kind of don't. Yeah, I'm a liar, too, a big one. I'm pretending it's always been about Juney.
"He is older Bedilia. You just said it, he's nine. And he's never had to share me before, and he's fighting it. But Jessica's been patient. She's been…."
"I don't want to hear how Jessica's been," I say, a little too much intensity on the 'J.'
"Hey…no one replaces you."
What does that mean?
"I told you, he can't wait to see you."
Oh…that's what it means.
"And I can't wait to see him," I say sweetly. And we stare at one another just a beat too long.
Artie calls us to dinner.
Chapter 11
He's not that glad to see me. After the awkward ride home in Artie's truck, me sitting between Artie and Marcus, one half of me asexual, the Artie side, what do you think, and the other side on freaking fire, well after that it was another attempt to clean up and meet downstairs for Juney's homecoming from his grandmother's house and feign normal.
Half an hour later I open the door and wave to Elaine as she drives off. Juney's a cute kid, looks just like Marcus must have, super cute. I have to admit I'm really glad to see him. "Hello Junior," I say, playing up the name he hates.
"Hello Bedilia Susannah," he says, like touché.
He squeezes under my arm with his backpack and walks right past me. "Where's Dad?" he says.
"Out back with Artie. Hey, don't I get a hug?"
"No," he says, taller than last time, when I left for Chicago, and he wouldn't come and give me a hug then either.
And he goes out the back door, and I hear Dad say, "Hey there he is," like it's Justin Bieber and Dad's a middle school girl.
So it's high-fives between him and the Beebs. I have my
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