Indecent Exposure

Indecent Exposure Read Free Page A

Book: Indecent Exposure Read Free
Author: Tom Sharpe
Tags: Humor
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had begun to regret ever starting the conversation.
    “And what shouldn’t policemen do?” There was no mistaking the note of disapproval in her voice.
    “Black women,” Verkramp blurted out. “They shouldn’t do black women, should they?”
    There was really no need to wait for the answer. Dr von Blimenstein’s face had gone a strange mauve colour and the veins were standing out on her neck.
    “Shouldn’t?” she shouted furiously. Several patients scampered away towards the main block. “Shouldn’t? Do you mean to say you’ve brought me out here just to tell me you’ve been screwing coon girls?”
    Luitenant Verkramp knew that he had made a terrible mistake. The doctor’s voice could be heard half a mile away.
    “Not me,” yelled Verkramp desperately. “I’m not talking about me.”
    Dr von Blimenstein stared at him doubtfully. “Not you?” she asked after a pause.
    “On my honour,” Verkramp assured her. “What I meant was that other police officers do and I thought you might have some ideas about how they can be stopped.”
    “Why can’t they be arrested and charged under the Immorality Act like everyone else?”
    Verkramp shook his head. “Well for one thing they are police officers which makes them rather difficult to catch and in any case it’s important to avoid the scandal.” Dr von Blimenstein stared at him in disgust.
    “Do you mean to tell me that this sort of thing goes on all the time?”
    Verkramp nodded.
    “In that case the punishment should be more severe,” said the doctor. “Seven years and ten strokes isn’t a sufficient deterrent. In my opinion any white man having sexual intercourse with a black woman should be castrated.”
    “I quite agree,” said Verkramp enthusiastically. “It would do them a lot of good.”
    Dr von Blimenstein looked at him suspiciously but there was nothing to suggest irony in Verkramp’s expression. He was staring at her with undisguised admiration. Encouraged by his frank agreement, the doctor continued.
    “I feel so strongly about miscegenation that I would be quite prepared to carry out the operation myself. Is anything wrong?”
    Luitenant Verkramp had suddenly turned very white. The idea of being castrated by the beautiful doctor corresponded so closely with his own masochistic fantasies that he felt quite overcome.
    “No. Nothing,” he gasped, trying to rid himself of the vision of the doctor, masked and robed, approaching him on the operating table. “It’s just a bit hot out here.” Dr von Blimenstein took him by the arm.
    “Why don’t we continue our discussion at my cottage? It’s cool down there and we can have some tea.” Luitenant Verkramp allowed himself to be led off the parade ground and down the hospital drive to the doctor’s cottage. Like the rest of the hospital buildings, it dated from the turn of the century when it had been officers’ quarters. Its stoep faced south and looked over the hills towards the coast and inside it was cool and dark. While Dr von Blimenstein made tea, Luitenant Verkramp sat in the sitting-room and wondered if he had been wise to broach the subject of sex with a woman as forceful as Dr von Blimenstein.
    “Why don’t you take off your jacket and make yourself comfortable?” the doctor asked when she returned with the tray. Verkramp shook his head nervously. He wasn’t used to having tea with ladies who asked him to take his jacket off and besides he rather doubted if his braces would go very well with the tasteful decorations in the room.
    “Oh come now,” said the doctor, “there’s no need to be formal with me. I’m not going to eat you.” Coming so shortly after the news that the doctor was an advocate of castration, the idea of being eaten by her as well was too much for Verkramp. He sat down hurriedly in a chair.
    “I’m perfectly all right like this,” he said, but Dr von Blimenstein wasn’t convinced.
    “Do you want me to take it off for you?” she asked, getting

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