In Search of Eden Read Free

reminded Wanda of the way some people painted Jesus, and her heart softened a littletoward them. Perhaps it would be all right. The baby was obviously going to a good home. That was the important thing.
    Still, her heart ached again as she passed room 510 on her way out. She slowed for a moment but didn’t go inside this time. She felt cowardly and ashamed, but the truth was, she didn’t think she could stand it. Even though she could see that one person’s heartache and loss was another’s blessing, it hurt too much. It was all just too sad.

chapter 2
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    DECEMBER 14, 2006 MINNEAPOLIS, MINNESOTA
    D orrie didn’t have the heart for making things up and playing games. Not today. It was better when this day fell on a Saturday or a Sunday, because then she could go off by herself, away from prying eyes. She could hide until it was no longer December fourteenth. Although the pain never went away completely, it was better on the fifteenth. More like a dull ache than a sharp, breathtaking drill bearing down on the exposed nerve of her heart.
    But today there was no hiding. Today would be sandpaper rubbed across that nerve. The problem was her current job at Good Shepherd Lutheran School. Normally she was the crossing guard and playground attendant. She usually loved being here and dressing in her silly outfits to entertain the children. One day she was Pippi Longstocking with pipe cleaners twisted into her hair to make her braids stand out. Another time she’d been Tinker Bell. The clown was the old standby. Then there was the pirate, the astronaut, the firefighter, the nurse. The children liked to see who she would be each day, and she smiled a little now as she looked out the classroom window and watched them chase one another.
    She glanced down at the plain jumper and blouse she wore today. The only thing silly was her Cinderella watch. And her shoes. They were patchwork with an assortment of buttons and bows, and she had bought them just because the children would like them. She checked the time, for today she was not playground supervisor or crossing guard. Today, due to the desperation of the tiny school, and the fact that they weren’t governed by the same regulations as public schools, she was pretending to be a teacher. She was pretending to be someone who had set a goal and accomplished it. Someone who had made something of her life.
    A nasty flu bug had made the school desperate for teachers. They’d already been hiring substitutes for the substitutes when the kindergarten teacher’s children had caught the virus. So she’d been put in charge. Temporarily, of course, and ordinarily she would be thrilled. Ordinarily she would be pinching herself and wondering when they would realize they had made a huge mistake. Ordinarily she would be heartsore that tomorrow was Friday and that on Monday their teacher would return. But today was no ordinary day. Today would be the most painful of places to be on this most painful of days.
    The bell rang and the children came in from recess. They hung up their coats with the noisy confusion that was as close to organization as they came, then semiquietly arranged themselves in an uneven half circle with legs crossed and hands on their laps. Crisscross applesauce, the way she’d taught them.
    â€œWe’re not going to do our story today,” Dorrie said brightly in a falsely cheery tone, holding up the fairy-tale book. “I’m going to read to you instead.” She hoped the children didn’t ask why.
    As they received the news that there would be no new installment of Hero, the talking blue jay, their small eager faces were slashed with disappointment they were powerless to hide. And, of course, her own heart wrenched. They were so vulnerable, children.So at the mercy of what the powerful ones decided to do with them. To them.
    â€œWe tried to be good, teacher.” Roger earnestly pushed back his tortoiseshell glasses and