How to Drive a Dragon Crazy Read Free Page A

there?”
    Imitating his eager tone, Éibhear quickly replied, “They will! And so will my father!”
    Uther’s face fell. “Oh.”
    Reflective, Aidan stroked his chin while pounding his back claw into the head of the Spike lying in front of him. Again . . . still seemed unnecessary as that Spike was already quite dead. “How did your father not become Mì-runach? He seems ruthless enough.”
    “Oh, he is,” Éibhear agreed. “But he can take orders.”
    “Aaaaah,” the others said.
    “So if we go with you,” Caswyn asked. “What do we do?”
    Éibhear shrugged. “It’s Garbhán Isle. There’ll be drink and pussy. What more do you need?” Garbhán Isle was the seat of power for the human queen of the Southlands, Annwyl the Bloody. Insane monarch and mate to Éibhear’s eldest brother Fearghus, Annwyl was adored and loathed in equal parts, but to Éibhear she’d simply become one of his sisters.
    “Nothing,” Uther said. “But that makes me sad.”
    “But first we take care of the Spikes leader in the Northlands.”
    His squad groaned.
    “What?”
    “I’m tired of snow and ice,” Caswyn complained. “I’m tired of shades of purple and white. I want to see grass again. And trees. Birds that aren’t crows.”
    “We won’t be in the Northlands long. Just long enough to do a little killing. You lot like killing. Remember?”
    “I do remember. But you seem to have forgotten that the Northlanders hate you,” Aidan reminded him.
    “Not more than the Ice Landers do.”
    “Only because you haven’t been there for the last decade. Trust me, if you had, they’d only hate you more.”
    “I want to see my sister Keita. As far as I know she’s still with Ragnar in the Northlands.”
    “A little elegance among the barbarians.” Aidan sighed. “I guess that’s worth something.”
    “So finish killing this lot,” Éibhear said, gesturing to the Spikes trying to crawl away. He really had to work on that with his team. They disabled, sometimes tortured, then killed, but the disabling and torture were just time consuming. They needed to kill faster so they could move to the drinking and females quicker. Honestly, one would think they’d know that already. “Then we head out.”
    Éibhear turned, saw a Spike fighting with one of the other squads. He pulled his sword and headed over to assist. Aidan caught up to him.
    “Oy,” his friend said.
    “What?”
    “You know what might be waiting for you back at Garbhán Isle, don’t you?”
    “The loving warmth of my mother, the admiration of my father, and the caring of my dear brothers?”
    “Are you going to be serious about this?”
    Éibhear chuckled, then rammed his sword into the side of the Spike. It was an easier way to attack an Ice Land dragon since they had those bloody spikes going from the top of their heads, down their spines, to the tips of their tails. He twisted the blade while using his free claw to push the Ice Lander down by the side of his neck.
    When the dragon took his last breath, Éibhear pulled out his sword, nodded at his fellow squad leader, then faced his friend. “Yeah. I know what might be waiting for me.”
    “And?”
    “And nothing. That was a long time ago . . . for a human. Besides, I apologized.”
    Aidan frowned. “When? You haven’t seen her in nearly ten bloody years.”
    “Remember? I sent her a letter.”
    “Oh. The letter. Right.” Aidan looked off. “Yeah. I remember. The letter.”
    “Although she never did answer me. Rude cow.”
    “Yeah. Rude.”
    “But I’m sure she’s over it. There was a healthy amount of groveling in that letter. She likes groveling.”
    “I’m sure she does.”
    “So there’s nothing to worry about.” Éibhear patted his suddenly quiet friend’s shoulder. “We’ll go. We’ll spend some time with my kin. Then hit every pub between Garbhán Isle and the Western Mountains as we go to meet up with Angor and the other squads. It’ll be a lovely holiday that we richly