How to Ditch Your Fairy Read Free Page A

think, but now I know better.”
    “Realy?”
    Rochele nodded earnestly.
    “Do you think fairies can read our minds?” I asked.
    “No. They’re not psychic or anything.”
    “So auras, yes; mind-reading, no?”
    “Yup,” Rochele replied, ignoring my mockage.
    “Hmmm, so how do they know if we’re mean or not?”
    “Don’t you know anything , Charlie?”
    I shrugged, not conceding ignorance, but not pretending I knew vast reams either.
    “They can see what we do. That’s al anyone needs to figure out if someone’s mean and doesn’t deserve a fairy. I mean, we can’t read Fiorenze’s mind, can we?”
    I shuddered. “The horror. Can you imagine? Who wants to go into her malodorous mind?”

    “Exactly,” Rochele said, finishing off her ice cream.
    I wasn’t sure what was exactly about it; our not reading Stupid-Name’s mind didn’t have anything to do with whether fairies could read our minds. “My mom reckons it’s random—what fairy we have. No merit involved,” I said. “Why can’t we see them, anyway?”
    “Because they’re in- vis-i-ble . Why can’t we see dust mites?”
    ” ‘Cause they’re realy, realy smal. But, Ro, we can see them.
    Through a microscope.”
    “That’s cheating.”
    “Do you reckon we could see a fairy through a microscope?”
    “Please!”
    A car honked. Rochele’s dad roled down his car window and yeled at her, even though she’d already stood up. “Sure you don’t want a lift?”
    I shook my head. Even if I hadn’t been on my walking-only regimen, I wouldn’t have taken a lift with Rochele’s horrendous father.
    “Stil walking everywhere?” Rochele asked as her dad honked again. “You realy think it’s going to get rid of your fairy?”
    “Hope so.”

CHAPTER 3
Parking Fairy
    Days walking: 60
    Demerits: 4
    Conversations with Steffi: 5
    Doos clothing acquired: 0
    I have a parking fairy. I’m fourteen years old. I can’t drive. I don’t like cars and I have a parking fairy.
    Rochele gets a clothes-shopping fairy and is always wel attired; I get a parking fairy and always smel faintly of gasoline. How fair is that? I love clothes and shopping too. Yes, I have a fine family (except for my sister, ace photographer Nettles, and even she’s tolerable sometimes) and yes, Rochele’s family is malodorous. She does deserve some kind of compensation. But why couldn’t I have, I don’t know, a good- hair fairy? Or, not even that doos, a loosechange-finding fairy. Lots of people have that fairy. Rochele’s dad, Sandra’s cousin, Mom’s best friend’s sister. I’d wholy settle for a loose- change fairy.
    It can be arduous hanging out with Rochele. She always looks doos in her perfect clothes. And sometimes I get bored going shopping with her al the time, even when her fairy is working for me. Sometimes I look forward to rainy days even though it means we have to play tennis indoors. Her fairy doesn’t work on rainy days.
    My fairy has no objection to rain. She just doesn’t do anything useful except make sure that whatever car I’m in finds the perfect parking spot. That’s why I’m walking home and not getting a lift from Rochele’s dad: it’s al part of my campaign to get rid of my fairy. I’m starving her of opportunities to do her thing so she’l want to go and be someone else’s fairy. Our Zora-Anne says this is the best method for getting rid of a fairy you don’t want. It’s how she got a charisma fairy after having been born with a never- getting-lost fairy. Our Z-A never went anywhere for five years so she couldn’t get lost and then one morning she woke up with a brand-new fairy, and before she knew it she was a star.
    It could happen to me too.
    So I walk. I could take the bus or the ferry or the lightrail, ‘cause it’s not like they need to park, but somehow walking seems much more wearisome for a parking fairy. For two months now I have walked everywhere. I haven’t even ridden my bike or board. For al I know my fairy may