Have a New Kid by Friday Read Free Page A

methods. None of the other techniques had worked. And Matthew was . . . well, getting to be a brat. She couldn’t believe she was actually thinking that about her own child, but it was true.
    She sighed. Desperate times call for desperate measures. But this new technique she’d heard about made so much sense. It had worked for three of her girlfriends. They said all it required was her standing up and being a parent, using consistency and follow-through in her own actions, and not backing down. She knew that would be the hardest part. She was a wuss when it came to Matthew. When he turned those big, blue, teary eyes on her, he always got what he wanted.
    But today things were changing, she determined. She was going to give this new method her best effort. She had to do something. Matthew was driving her crazy. Just last week he’d thrown a temper tantrum in the mall; he’d bitten the neighbor girl when she wouldn’t give him a toy of hers that he wanted; and the preschool had told her she needed to do something about Matthew’s aggressive behavior toward his classmates.
    Once she and Matthew got in the house, she didn’t say a word. She went about her business, putting away the shopping bags from the car. After a few minutes, Matthew wandered into the kitchen. Usually chocolate chip cookies and milk awaited him there. It was his routine after-preschool snack.
    “Mommy, where are my cookies and milk?” he asked, looking at the usual place on the kitchen counter.
    “We’re not having cookies and milk today,” she said matter-of-factly. Then she turned her back on the child she’d pushed 11½ hours for and walked into another room.
    Did Matthew say to himself, Well, I guess I’ll have to do without that today ? No, because children are creatures of habit. So what did Matthew do? He followed his mother to the next room.
    “Mommy, I don’t understand. We always have cookies and milk after preschool.”
    Mom looked him in the eye and said, “Mommy doesn’t feel like getting you cookies and milk today.” She turned and walked into another room.
    By now, Matthew was like an NFL quarterback on Sunday afternoon—scrambling to get to the goal. He followed his mom into the next room. “But, Mommy, this has never happened before.” There was panic in his voice. He was starting to tremble. “I don’t understand.”

    Mom now knew that Matthew was ready to hear what she had to say. It was the teachable moment: the moment when reality enters the picture and makes an impact on the child’s mind and heart. It’s the time when a parent has to give her child the straight skinny.
    “We are not having milk and cookies today because Mommy doesn’t like the way you talked to me in the car.” Again, Mom turned to walk away.
    But before she took three steps, Matthew had a giant meltdown. He ran toward his mother and grabbed her leg (after all, he is part of the ankle-biter battalion). He was crying profusely. “I’m sorry, Mommy! I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have said that.”
    Time for another wonderful opportunity. The mom accepted Matthew’s apology, gave him a hug, and reminded him that she loved him. She also told him how she felt when he talked to her like that. Three minutes later, things were patched up, and she let Matthew out of her embrace. She began again to go about her work.
    What did she hear next from Matthew? “Mommy, can I have my milk and cookies now?”
    It was the moment she feared. She steeled her courage and said calmly, “Honey, I told you no. We are not going to have milk and cookies today.”
    Matthew was stunned. He opened his mouth to argue, then walked away sadly.
    Let me ask you: will that little boy think next time before he disses his mother?
    Why Little Buford Misbehaves . . .
    and Gets Away with It
    Why is it these days that so many children tend to diss their parents, to act disrespectfully? Why are so many parents caught in the roles of threatening and cajoling and never getting