God's Little Acre

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Book: God's Little Acre Read Free
Author: Erskine Caldwell
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fact.”
    “Well, we won’t discuss it any more just now. There’ll be plenty of time to talk about it when you get married.”
    Pluto felt the blood running over his face just beneath his skin. He took out his handkerchief and wiped his face with it for a long time.
    “But there’s one thing about it—”
    “What’s that, Pluto?”
    “Darling Jill said she didn’t like me with such a fat belly. I can’t help it, Ty Ty.”
    “What in the pluperfect hell has your belly got to do with it?” Ty Ty said. “Darling Jill is crazy some, Pluto. Don’t pay no attention to what she says. Just go ahead and marry her and don’t pay it no mind. She’ll be all right after you get her off somewhere for a while. Darling Jill is crazy sometimes, and about nothing.”
    “And there was something else,” Pluto said, turning his face away from Ty Ty.
    “What is that?”
    “I don’t like to bring it up.”
    “Just go ahead and say it, Pluto, and after you’ve said it, it’ll be done and can’t be coming back to bother you.”
    “I heard that she ain’t so particular about what she does sometimes.”
    “Just like what, for example?”
    “Well, I heard that she’s been teasing and fooling with a lot of men.”
    “Has things been said about my daughter, Pluto?”
    “Well, about Darling Jill.”
    “What do people say, Pluto?”
    “Nothing much, except that she’s been teasing and fooling with a lot of men.”
    “I’m tickled to death to hear that. Darling Jill is the baby of the family, and she’s coming along at last. I sure am glad to hear that.”
    “She ought to quit it, because I want to marry her.”
    “Never mind, Pluto,” Ty Ty said. “Don’t pay no heed to it. Don’t give it no attention. She is careless, to be sure, but she don’t mean no harm. She’s just made that way. It don’t hurt her none, not so that you will notice it, anyway. I reckon a lot of women are like that, a little or more, according to their natures. Darling Jill likes to tease a man some, but she don’t mean no real harm. A pretty girl like Darling Jill has got everything coming her way, anyhow, and she knows it. It’s up to you to satisfy her, Pluto, and make her so pleased she’ll leave off with everybody but you. She’s just been acting that way because she’s come along now and there’s been nobody man enough to hold her down. You’re man enough to keep her satisfied. I can see that in your eyes, Pluto. Don’t let that bother you no more.”
    “It’s a pity God can’t make a woman like Darling Jill and then leave off before He goes too far. That’s what He did to her. He didn’t know when He had made enough of a good thing. He just kept on and on—and now look at her! She’s so full of teasing and the rest that I don’t know that I’d ever have a peaceful night’s rest when we get married.”
    “Well, it might be God’s fault that He didn’t know when to stop, Pluto, but just the same Darling Jill ain’t the only girl He has made like that. In my time I’ve run across a heap like her. And I wouldn’t have to go a thousand miles from home to cite you one. Now, you take Buck’s wife, there. Pluto, I declare I don’t know what to make of so pretty a girl as Griselda.”
    “That’s what you think now, but I don’t see how it can be so, Ty Ty. I’ve seen lots of women a little like her, but I’ve yet to see one that’s as crazy as she is. When I get to be sheriff, I wouldn’t want to have her running loose all the time like she does now. It wouldn’t be good for my political career. I’ve got to keep that in mind.”
    “You ain’t elected yet, Pluto.”
    “No, not yet, but everything is pointing my way. I’ve got a lot of friends working for me night and day all over the county. If somebody don’t come along and shuffle the deck again, I’ll get the office with no trouble at all.”
    “Tell them not to come here to my place, Pluto. I pledge you my vote, and all the votes on the place.

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