Gazza: My Story Read Free Page B

Looking back, it was the first time in my life I was aware of death. I’d never actually seen anyone die. I’ve always been afraid of dying, for many reasons, since then, but until that counselling session, I’d never realised when it all began.
    “ Paul did make us laugh. I used to look forward to him coming home from school and telling us the latest joke he’d heard, or something funny that had happened. ”
    Carol Gascoigne, Paul’s mother

2

STEVEN
    According to me mam, I was playing football when I was nine months old. I walked at nine months, and talked at nine months, so I might have managed to push a ball around as well. From about four or five I was playing all the time, in the street and in the park, just like most of the other boys in our neighbourhood.
    My dad had played when he was younger, just for a local team, a railway team, and on Sunday afternoons he used to have a knockaround in the park, after he’d been to the pub, just with his mates, other grown-ups, most of them probably half-drunk. I used to play with them, even though I was only little. He would encourageme to do tricks and I could tell he was proud of my skill.
    I suppose I knew from about the age of seven, when I was given that first football, that I had a talent for the game. I was aware that I could play it better than other boys. My dad would give me tests, getting me to dribble down the pavement with my ball to the shops and back, timing me, and then making me do it again, only quicker. When I did a paper round, I used to kick a ball with me all the way, in and out of the houses.
    I first got into the school football team when I was eight, even though I was younger and smaller than everyone else. At ten I won my first little trophy, and from then on, I wanted to be a professional player, though if you’d asked me at the time what I wanted to be when I grew up I would probably have said a millionaire. I remember announcing just that on the bus one day when the other lads were talking about their own ambitions.
    I was awarded my cup in a penalty competition for all Gateshead primary schools, scoring 12 out of 12. I took my trophy home and kept it under the bed in case any burglars found it. I then got a place on a weekend coaching course at a country camp, where I met KeithSpraggon. He lived not far away from me but went to a different school. He was very good at football, and we became close friends.
    What I wanted was to get into the local Redheugh Boys’ Club. They had a brilliant football team, and their big rivals were Wallsend Boys, who have produced many well-known Newcastle players over the years. I was too young to join the club, but I’d climb over the wall and watch them training. I pestered everyone to take me along until finally I persuaded my dad to get me in. He had to swear that I was a couple of years older than I was. At first I just acted as ballboy or helped put up the nets, but eventually I got into the team, and so did Keith Spraggon.
    My first hero was Johan Cruyff. I watched him on telly over and over again, and copied his turn. I also loved Pele, like every other football fan. I was a Newcastle supporter, of course, from an early age. When we lived at Edison Gardens, we could hear the roar from the Gallowgate End at St James’ Park. The player I liked best in the team was Malcolm Macdonald. He was my first local hero, I suppose.
    At eleven, I left Brighton Junior Mixed for Breckenbeds Junior High. I was good at all sports, usuallythe best in the school. I won cups for basketball, tennis and badminton and of course played football for the school. I liked maths and was quite good at it, and I learned to play chess. I pestered my mother to buy me a set, and when she did I taught her how to play as well. I’d also play cards with her for money. I usually won, but she’d keep going till either she won her money back or I fell asleep.
    Whenever I had any money, I’d spend it on sweets. Keith and I and some other