Four New Messages Read Free Page B

brought ‘snax.’
    Wink! wink!
    Thats what he does for a living. He brings snax that are OK priced but also of crackhead quality.
    Anyways.
    Were all just hanging out smoking getting our drink on telling stories about former bfs and gfs when RICHARD MONOMIAN tells us this story.
    About another party he went to.
    A high school party.
    Now when the guy who brings the snax begins doing the snax and telling stories about high school you know its time to bag for home but for some reason we didnt.
    This was spring break, end of senior year.
    Before P’ton, obvs.
    It was a big houseparty at a big house with the hosts parents away—remember those?
    It ended with everyone oblitermerated passed out on random beds in random rooms and RICHARD MONOMIAN searching around for an empty bedroom to crash in.
    And he found like a guestroom or spare for using the computer or phone in room and there was a bed in the corner or like a foldout sofa.
    A girl was sleeping.
    RICHARD MONOMIAN said he didnt remember her name but even if he had remembered it and told me I wouldnt repeat it, thats not my style.
    RICHARD MONOMIAN said this sleeping girl was cute, I guess not cute enough to rape.
    Instead he pulled his pants down below his ass tits and pulled down his underwear also.
    RICHARD MONOMIAN grabbed his penis and stroked—he stood over her and stroked it!!
    Dick fisting his shit! Dick fisting his shit!
    Dick grabbed his hard dick hard and below him the girl kept sleeping.
    He was on MDMA I think.
    I think ecstasy and weeds.
    Highlarious!
    Suddenly he came: RICHARD MONOMIAN blew a load that landed in her hand.
    RICHARD MONOMIAN said he didnt wipe it up because he didnt want to wake her, he just pulled up his underwear and pulled up his pants and fell downstairs and out the door for home.
    Thats it.
    All the deets I have.
    Retardedly I didnt take a pic of him last night and cant find a pic online but Im sure one of my readers can and if you can then fwd: because I sometimes need a pic to look at to get less horny, Subject line: because I sometimes need a pic to look at to get less horny,
    (And if youre that girl who woke one morning on a strange sofabed in a strange house with a jizzy palm worried about what happened, maybe you ran out to get tested, maybe you ran out to get the pill—this is it, youre welcome, be careful where you fall asleep, sista.)
    At least his pic wasn’t available. That was the best benefit of his previous anonymity.
    Mono tried to remember what pics of him were around. Not many, few digitized. School portraits, a few snaps with friends moved away to colleges, and family poses, most of which his father had storaged. Easier to imagine a picture of yourself than to imagine yourself. He thought, why is it so hard to remember colors? And did anyone else think of death while being shot for an employee ID? (Besides the passport the only photo of himself he had was just that, from that week pretzeling at Quaker Mall.)
    He stayed in bed, blowing through what cash he had left ordering to his door medium pizzas and Asian noodle decoctions waiting for Methyl to call with his next assignment as the legitimate world with its legitimate rewards stopped calling, stopped responding to his calls—him sitting up in bed, with the pillow verticalized between his legs as stuffed buffer between computer and any Monomians to come, searching himself, researching his name, “within quotes.”
    Three results went to four when another blog he suspected this Em of hosting linked to the Emission, then four upticked to six when two readers of those blogs linked up from blogs of their own.
    Sometimes it was just an embed singly described, Disgusting, other times it was a capsule blurb that transclused: Em, a college girl from Jerzee who’s been keeping a party diary, writes about a guy masturbating on top of a sleeping girl … NSFW.
    But that was a particularly responsible example and most of the keywords were rather: Wrong, Sinister, This is just