Dreamside Read Free Page B

but couldn't. As for
himself, he had stopped pretending. These few hours with Ella had stripped him
bare. The scaling-over of the years had been uncovered, old feelings made new,
leaving him exposed, inferior, in love with her. How did she do that?
    He leaned
forward and kissed her neck. He felt her stiffen, but she didn't pull away.
    "What
are you doing, Lee?"
    "I'm
kissing you."
    She turned
around. "Let's not add confusion to a bad situation, eh?"
    It seemed
to Lee that he had been, on the contrary, trying to straighten things out. He
said nothing. Ella closed the issue by standing up.
    "I'm
very tired. Can we say that it's settled? You go after one of them, I go after
the other? "
    Lee
shrugged.
    "As of tomorrow?"
    "As of tomorrow." He looked unhappy.
    "Dreams
won't wait, Lee."
    "No;
they won't, will they?"
    "I
think it would be better if I went for her. I can talk with her. You go after
him."
    "You
make it sound like a bounty hunt."
    "It
won't be as easy as that. Now, show me my room. It's late."

 
     
    T H R E E

 
 
    I have spread my dreams under
your feet;
    Tread softly, because you tread on my dreams
    —W. B.
Yeats
    She had to move fast to be on
time for the ferry. With about twenty minutes to
spare she drove the Midget on to the boat at Stranraer, and was glad to get out to stretch her legs. After spending the night at Lee's
flat she had driven back to her house in Cumbria, had a second bad night's
sleep before driving hard to catch the boat to Larne.
    Slipping
out of the harbour at Stranraer, with the dockside diminishing with each blink,
she felt the sea breeze stir around her and along with it came her first
misgivings about what she was doing, doubts about her Northern Ireland mission.
All her energies had gone into persuading Lee to trust her instincts and follow
her lead. She hadn't thought to stand back and question her convictions.
    She thought
about Lee, at his house, wanting to kiss her. She had no illusions about it. It
was an act of desperation. He thought that a renewal of their relationship
would be a way of holding off terror; he wanted to distil from intimacy the
bitter-sweet salve which offers protection.
    Lee, stolid
Lee, had lowered his eyes in an attempt to disguise a disappointment that would
have been no more obvious if he had cried out loud and smitten his brow. He was
too gentle to do anything but accept her rejection and retire to his bed, where
he would curl up with his confusion. But in the night, when Ella had felt the
bad dreams thickening around her like storm clouds, she had thought of Lee,
lying asleep and vulnerable in the darkness of his room. So she'd confused him
even further by going to him and slipping into his bed.
    Lee had woken up to feel her next to him.
    "I'm
cold; go back to sleep." Which was what he did, happily; and for which
Ella was thankful.
    In the morning Ella had felt
the muscular warmth of Lee's arms wrapped around her waist, though he slept on.
She could feel his erection becoming hard against the back of her thighs.
Sliding out of his unrestraining arms, she pulled on some clothes and opened
the blinds. She put coffee on to brew and walked out of the flat, leaving the
door open.
    Lee was
woken by the telephone. He looked around for Ella. He could smell the fresh
coffee brewing.
    "It's me."
    "Where are you?"
    "A
hundred yards down the street. Thought I'd pull you out of it with the
telephone. We don't want any bad starts to the day."
    "You're a life saver, Ella."
    "One day you might save mine." Click.
    Lee had showered by the time
Ella returned, clutching a bag of croissants. "It's good," he said.
"I feel more confident this morning. There's a clarity which I haven't
felt for a while. The smell of the coffee and the croissants. This is awake."
    Lee's
confidence brought a lot of things back to Ella. But if she suspected that it
was neither coffee nor croissants that made Lee feel stronger, she didn't say
anything. Anyway, she had to agree with him. It was