Daughters of Spain Read Free Page B

a husband that I shall be forced to take? Is that why she is so sorry for me?
    The Queen put the Princess from her and composed her features.
    'My dearest,' she said, 'you do not look as well as I would wish. How is your cough?'
    'I cough now and then, Highness, as I always have.'
    'Isabella, my child, now that we are alone together, let us throw aside all ceremony. Call me Mother. I love to hear the word on your lips.'
    The Princess began: 'Oh, my Mother ...' and then she was sobbing in the Queen's arms.
    'There, my precious child,' murmured Isabella. 'You still think of him then? Is it that?'
    'I was so happy ... happy. Mother, can you understand? I was so frightened at first, and when I found that ... we loved ... it was all so wonderful. We planned to live like that for the rest of our lives ...'
    The Queen did not speak; she went on stroking her daughter's hair.
    'It was cruel ... so cruel. He was so young. And when we went out into the forest that day it was like any other day. He was with me but ten minutes before it happened ... laughing ... with me. And then there he was ...'
    'It was God's will,' said the Queen gently.
    'God's will? To break a young body like that! Wantonly to take one so young, so full of life and love!'
    The Queen's face set into stern lines. 'Your grief has unnerved you, my child. You forget your duty to God. If it is His wish to make us suffer we must accept suffering gladly.'
    'Gladly! I will never accept it gladly.'
    The Queen hastily crossed herself, while her lips moved in prayer. Isabella thought: She is praying that I may be forgiven my wicked outburst. However much she suffered she would never give way to her feelings as I have done.
    She was immediately contrite. 'Oh, Mother, forgive me. I know not what I say. It is like that sometimes. The memories come back and then I fear ...'
    'You must pray, my darling, for greater control. It is not God's wish that you should shut yourself away from the world as you do.'
    'It is not my father's wish, you mean?' demanded Isabella.
    'Neither the wish of your heavenly nor your earthly father,' murmured the Queen soothingly.
    'I would to God I could go into a convent. My life finished when his did.'
    'You are questioning the will of God. Had He wished you to end your life He would have taken you with your husband. This is your cross, my darling; think of Him and carry it as willingly as He carried His.'
    'He had only to die. I have to live.'
    'My dearest, have a care. I will double my prayers for you this night and every night. I fear your sufferings have affected your mind. But in time you will forget.'
    'It is four years since it happened, Mother. I have not forgotten yet.'
    'Four years! It seems long to you because you are young. To me it is like yesterday.'
    'To me it will always be as though his death happened yesterday.'
    'You must fight against such morbid thoughts, my darling. It is a sin to nurse a grief. I sent for you because I have news for you. Your father-in-law has died and there is a new King of Portugal.'
    'Alonso would have been King had he lived ... and I his Queen.'
    'But he did not live, yet you could still be Queen of Portugal.'
    'Emanuel ...'
    'My dear daughter, he renews his offer to you. Now that he has come to the throne he does not forget you. He is determined to have no wife but you.'
    Emanuel! She remembered him well. Kindly, intelligent, he was more given to study than his gay young cousin Alonso had been; but she had known that he envied Alonso his bride. And now he was asking for her hand once more.
    'I would rather go into a nunnery.'
    'We might all feel tempted to do that which seems easier to us than our duty.'
    'Mother, you are not commanding me to marry Emanuel?'
    'You married once, by the command of your father andmyself. I would not command you again; but I would have you consider your duty to your family ... to Spain.'
    Isabella clenched her hands tightly together. 'Do you realise what you are asking of me? To go