replaying the last thing my dad said and I keep stopping at ‘Alec will help you’.
Lorraine interrupts my thoughts. "OK, Dell, I have everything you need for a few nights. Are you ready to go?"
"Yeah," I mumble.
She leads me to the minivan, and I turn to look at the house. My entire life was spent in this place and in an instant, my entire life ended. A feeling of pure gut-wrenching pain washes over me.
Chapter
5
I wake up in the guest bedroom at Lyla’s house. It takes me a minute to realize what I’m doing here. Memories of the night before start to flood into my brain in vivid detail.
"Good morning." Lyla is lying on the floor. "What are you doing in the floor when you have a perfectly good bed?"
"I didn't want you to be alone. I snuck in, in the middle of the night." I’m overwhelmed with the kindness of the gesture. "Seriously though, I was so scared that I couldn't sleep." She shudders and her eyes are starting to glisten. I can tell she is close to breaking down.
I quickly look at the ceiling. "No tears for you." I try to put on a brave face before looking at her. Lyla may have some faults, but she is soft. If I break down, she will break down, and the cycle will never end.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really," I say. Honestly, I don't want to talk about it because I don't want to face it. "I’m still numb and don't want to start feeling it just yet. Yah know?"
She looks at me sympathetically for a second. "Come on. Let's get some food." She grabs my hand and yanks me out of bed. She gets that what I need now more than anything is normalcy. Even if it’s just for a little while.
~~~~
Downstairs , Lorraine is sitting at the table with the newspaper and a bowl of oatmeal. She looks up and smiles tentatively. "How are you feeling this morning?"
Politely, I answer, "I’m OK, thank you for asking." She knows I’m full of it, but she accepts my response and lets it go for now. Eventually, I will have to deal with things, but I’m not ready yet.
"What do you want to eat?" Lyla walks to the cabinets in the kitchen.
"Whatever you’re having," I respond automatically.
"Alright ladies, I have to go to work. I want you guys to check-in every few hours." Apparently she’s afraid because of last night's events as well.
"OK Mom." Lyla rolls her eyes.
"And no eating junk food all day." She eyes Lyla, who would have Binge Night all day, every day if she could. "I love you." Before she turns to leave, she looks at me with sad eyes.
I know she's hurting. Maybe not as much as I am, but my mother and her became best friends through the years of Lyla and me being inseparable.
~~~~
" So , what do you want to do today?" Lyla asks.
Not quite sure how to answer I shrug. There’s a lot weighing on my mind, and I need to talk about it. I'm just not sure how to tell my best friend that I’m pretty sure I heard my dad’s voice in my head. I try to work through it all in my head first.
"Whenever you figure out what it is you need to get off your chest I'll be here to listen. Until then, how about we paint our nails?"
Ugh. The only things we really don't see eye to eye on are the girly things. Lyla is all about the pretty in the world. She spends more time on beauty regimes than an A-list celebrity. I, on the other hand, prefer band t-shirts and Chuck Taylors.
Still, anything to keep my mind busy, is good with me. So for the first time ever I say, "OK."
She instantly brightens and jumps up. She’s so easy to please. Although I’m not sure if it’s because she wants to paint my nails or because she needs to not feel so awkward around me. She comes back with her collection of nail polishes that would make any salon owner jealous.
"I'm thinking either bubblegum pink or outrageous orchid." She holds up the two colors for me to compare.
I scrunch my face. "They're not quite me, let me look." I pull out a deep burgundy color. “Here, this will do."
She grabs the bottle. "If
Lorraine interrupts my thoughts. "OK, Dell, I have everything you need for a few nights. Are you ready to go?"
"Yeah," I mumble.
She leads me to the minivan, and I turn to look at the house. My entire life was spent in this place and in an instant, my entire life ended. A feeling of pure gut-wrenching pain washes over me.
Chapter
5
I wake up in the guest bedroom at Lyla’s house. It takes me a minute to realize what I’m doing here. Memories of the night before start to flood into my brain in vivid detail.
"Good morning." Lyla is lying on the floor. "What are you doing in the floor when you have a perfectly good bed?"
"I didn't want you to be alone. I snuck in, in the middle of the night." I’m overwhelmed with the kindness of the gesture. "Seriously though, I was so scared that I couldn't sleep." She shudders and her eyes are starting to glisten. I can tell she is close to breaking down.
I quickly look at the ceiling. "No tears for you." I try to put on a brave face before looking at her. Lyla may have some faults, but she is soft. If I break down, she will break down, and the cycle will never end.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"Not really," I say. Honestly, I don't want to talk about it because I don't want to face it. "I’m still numb and don't want to start feeling it just yet. Yah know?"
She looks at me sympathetically for a second. "Come on. Let's get some food." She grabs my hand and yanks me out of bed. She gets that what I need now more than anything is normalcy. Even if it’s just for a little while.
~~~~
Downstairs , Lorraine is sitting at the table with the newspaper and a bowl of oatmeal. She looks up and smiles tentatively. "How are you feeling this morning?"
Politely, I answer, "I’m OK, thank you for asking." She knows I’m full of it, but she accepts my response and lets it go for now. Eventually, I will have to deal with things, but I’m not ready yet.
"What do you want to eat?" Lyla walks to the cabinets in the kitchen.
"Whatever you’re having," I respond automatically.
"Alright ladies, I have to go to work. I want you guys to check-in every few hours." Apparently she’s afraid because of last night's events as well.
"OK Mom." Lyla rolls her eyes.
"And no eating junk food all day." She eyes Lyla, who would have Binge Night all day, every day if she could. "I love you." Before she turns to leave, she looks at me with sad eyes.
I know she's hurting. Maybe not as much as I am, but my mother and her became best friends through the years of Lyla and me being inseparable.
~~~~
" So , what do you want to do today?" Lyla asks.
Not quite sure how to answer I shrug. There’s a lot weighing on my mind, and I need to talk about it. I'm just not sure how to tell my best friend that I’m pretty sure I heard my dad’s voice in my head. I try to work through it all in my head first.
"Whenever you figure out what it is you need to get off your chest I'll be here to listen. Until then, how about we paint our nails?"
Ugh. The only things we really don't see eye to eye on are the girly things. Lyla is all about the pretty in the world. She spends more time on beauty regimes than an A-list celebrity. I, on the other hand, prefer band t-shirts and Chuck Taylors.
Still, anything to keep my mind busy, is good with me. So for the first time ever I say, "OK."
She instantly brightens and jumps up. She’s so easy to please. Although I’m not sure if it’s because she wants to paint my nails or because she needs to not feel so awkward around me. She comes back with her collection of nail polishes that would make any salon owner jealous.
"I'm thinking either bubblegum pink or outrageous orchid." She holds up the two colors for me to compare.
I scrunch my face. "They're not quite me, let me look." I pull out a deep burgundy color. “Here, this will do."
She grabs the bottle. "If
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