Backstage At Chippendales Read Free Page B

Then, I think to myself, Jeez, he could’ve asked me my name at least.  Of course I was too nervous, nay, just too plain scared to give it, much less to ask him what his name was!  Save the introductions for later, Greg, I thought.  Like for instance, if you make it through your first night, maybe then…yes, maybe then.

Chapter Five
My First Night Begins:
What Does A “Greeter” Do?
     
                  So I hoofed it back up to the front hallway to where the little ticket booth was, and none too soon it turned out. Just coming up the top of the steps was a party of three ladies. I hesitatingly approached the group, and just as I passed Geneva’s booth, I heard her muffled cheer, “Go get ‘em, lover boy!” Just then, I became keenly aware that I was the only host there ! Apparently “Greeter” was a solo job!?!  What was I to do with no other hosts to take cues from?  Too late though, I had nary a moment to wonder nor complain, I just had to straight wing it—and by God I did just that.  I had no other choice. 
    I clumsily ambled up to the trio, past the podium and ropes, with what could only have been a most awkward, silly grin plastered across my face, and spouted out the only thing that came to mind.  “Hello ladies, welcome to Chippendales!”
    Well thank God, despite my amateurish disposition, these ladies bought it that I was a real Chippendale!  However oafishly, I tried my best to flirt in some semblance a smooth, gentlemanly, Chippendale-like fashion, (whatever that was).  I was smiling, fake-laughing and asking each of their names (but forgetting them just as quickly, like the nervous, bungling Chippendale virgin I dare not let on that I was).  Still, I knew the women had
     
     
    to be buying the idea that I was the genuine article, when, out of the blue, one of them pulls a camera from her purse and asks me to pose next to her two friends so she can take pictures of us!  I play along like a good sport, mugging for the camera in several increasingly more provocative poses with each of her two friends while the woman happily snaps away, the camera flashing wildly, with she and her friends laughing all the while.
    So as it had become apparent that these women were not going to notice my relative ineptitude, I momentarily became just a wee bit more comfortable…just for a second anyway.  Just then, a rumbling came from the bottom of the staircase—a second bunch—a bevy of boisterous beauties this time, seven young women came clamoring up the staircase!  
    Now this would get trickier. How would I begin talking and flirting with these girls in the second group without causing the gals in the first group to feel slighted?  How indeed?  Ohhh boy was I in over my head now! Surely NOW they would find out I wasn’t a REAL Chippendale! What was I to do? Where was my back up? Yes, where the heck WAS my back up? So I backed up. And backed up.  And I backed up…to Geneva…and I asked, “Where’s my back up ?”
    “Oh, honey, there’s no ‘back up’” she replied, “you’re on your own up here.”
     
     
     
    My worst fears assured, I responded, “I’m on my own? How can they put me up here completely on my own ? Its my FIRST DAY!?!”
    “They must figure you got the personality for it sweetheart…Don’t you think you think you can do it?”
    “Awww, Jeez, Geneva, I, …ya know…(shaking my head) ...aaahhh ...I tell ya …well, if anyone can do it on their first night, Geneva…I guess probably I can do it!” 
    “That’s the spirit!” She exclaimed. “What’s your name again?”
    “Greg.” I said again.
    “Well you go do your stuff, Greg. You go show those ladies what’s what!”  And so I shuffled forward away from Geneva’s booth and set off to show all those ladies ‘what’s what’ by golly. Or so I imagined for the moment.
                  So I figured I would “take charge” of the situation, right?  Then I step up to the podium