Back To You Read Free Page B

into her eyes and see the smile that was always hiding just behind the surface.
    This wasn’t good.  He desperately wanted the courage to ask her out, but he struggled with the fear of rejection.  Most guys did.  He knew that even though she would smile at him, she probably didn’t really think much about him.  He wasn’t sure he could handle the same kind of heartbreak he had received from Beth Anne.  Maybe he just wasn’t attractive.  Do I smell funny?  Have food in my teeth?   It didn’t matter, he just didn’t have the guts to do it.  Not yet anyway.  Until then he would sneak a peek at her whenever she was reading or asking a question, or even passing a note to Reneigh.
     
    *****
     
    The year before, a teen dance club opened in town.  It was called Monopoly’s.  It was so cool inside!  Basically it was a large metal warehouse that had exposed beams and supports.  It was decorated in the theme of the board game. The walls were covered in huge pieces of plywood painted to look like property cards.  The dance floor was painted to look like the actual board with all of the properties and stuff.  The DJ booth was “jail” and was up a flight of steps looking over the dance floor.  The rest of the place was painted black and red.  The concept behind the club was to provide a really cool social outlet that would keep teens off the streets and away from drinking and drugs.  No one under the age of thirteen or over the age of eighteen was allowed in.  The music was loud, lights were dim, and it was the perfect place to be on the weekends. 
    And we were there.  Every weekend.  Most of the time I went over to Reneigh’s house, or she came to mine so we could get ready to go out.  It was a huge process!  Wash the hair, pick out the clothes, put on the makeup and fix the hair.  Curling irons were ev erywhere, clothes thrown around the room as we tried to find the perfect outfit.  We would emerge in clouds of hairspray and perfume, ready to meet the boy of our dreams. 
    By this time, I was beginning to notice that Donna and I hadn’t been spending as much time together.  We didn’t have any classes together that year.  Plus she had a serious boyfriend.  Sure, we still spent the night here and there, but this was where the separation began.  I missed her, but was getting caught up in the social events and some of the popular people.  I had never considered myself popular, and truthfully, although I envied some of the girls who seemed so popular, I didn’t really like many of them. 
    Teenage girls were a mystery to anyone who tried to figure them out, including ourselves.  Popular teenage girls are even harder to figure out.  Some of them are popular because they are obviously sweet and smart and cute and all that crap.  Others are popular because they “put out” according to what is spent on them on a date.  And then you have the bitches.  They are popular because people are afraid to make them mad.  They are usually hanging out in packs, talking about people behind their backs.  Our school was no different.  We had leaders and we had followers, make that “worshipers”.  I think it was the worshipers that got on my nerves the most.  The worshipers always seemed to be in competition for attention, doing everything they could to gain approval from the “beautiful ones”.  This process really brought out the worst in them.  Seriously.  Some of those girls were just nasty, mean and hateful.
    As for me, I guess I was sort of in my own boat.  Like I said, I never thought of myself as popular.  I had gotten to know a lot of the girls at school but chose not to hang out with most of them.  Not because I was being a snob, but I was just not up for the competition, and I hated two faced bitches who don’t know what being a friend meant.  I would rather be a good friend than a worshiper.  I was stuck someplace between wanting to be pe rfect and doing everything I could to